


How to Build a Home

by pipblakely



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Adoption, Comedy, Dads AU, Domestic Fluff, Dukexiety - Freeform, Established Relationship, Flashbacks, Found Family, Logince - Freeform, M/M, Marriage, Moceit - Freeform, OCs - Freeform, Roman is a himbo, Romance, Romantic Comedy, a little angst as a treat, logan worries a lot, parenting, sitcom-esque
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-01
Updated: 2021-03-10
Packaged: 2021-03-11 23:26:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 38,541
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29125671
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pipblakely/pseuds/pipblakely
Summary: Logan has his life with his boyfriend all planned out. He knows when he’s going to propose to Roman, an itemised list of wedding venues, where they might like to find a house to settle down and start a family one day. But having kids was far down the timeline, he wasn’t expecting Roman’s friend to have an unwanted pregnancy and that Roman would want to adopt the baby.Even with big changes, mishaps and drama thrown their way, Logan, Roman and their support group of friends will make it through with laughter, tears and terrible dad jokes.A house is not a home. Home is what you create together.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders/Logic | Logan Sanders, Deceit | Janus Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders
Comments: 45
Kudos: 57





	1. Wedding Bell Blues

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, I don't see enough content for my favourite ship of all time. The prince and the nerd, my red and blue gays: Roman and Logan. I've written many stories and roleplayed about them but this is my first real go at posting a fanfiction with them as the focus. It's going to take place over the years of their life together and there will be some flashbacks to their time in high school and college throughout. Hope you enjoy! -Jess

After the last show of the school musical, the audience had all filtered out and the auditorium was mostly empty. The cast were getting hyped for their after party and the stage was slowly being cleaned by teachers and the students not cool enough to join the fun. Logan Thomas was one of them. He was in the wings sweeping on the floor with a dustpan and brush when whose feet should come into view but Roman Sanders. Logan recognised the black dress shoes Roman had been wearing for his whole performance of Into the Woods. He stood up quickly, trying to compose himself to be completely unflushed and neutral in Roman’s presence. He was better at this at some times more than others. Just now was particularly tricky, considering Roman was still in his prince costume, white with a red sash and gold trim details. It looked so good on him Logan thought he should wear it every day. He was grinning, eyes sparkling and he was buzzing with excitement after finishing his last performance.  
“Did you see me out there?” Roman asked.  
“Who do you think was controlling the light on you, I had to be looking at you.” Logan answered, making his words as flat as possible. Roman rolled his eyes good naturedly.  
“Come on, you loved it.”  
“I don’t have any strong feelings for theatre. I’m here to fill out a quota in my extracurriculars, colleges don’t like it if it looks like all you care about is schoolwork.”  
“But that is all you care about, right Bill Nye?”  
“No…” Logan looked around. Roman was here with him, rather than with all his loud, popular friends who would no doubt be going berserk right now. Getting ready to make a ton of reckless teenage memories that would become funny stories to tell at reunions years later. “What are you doing back here anyway, did you forget something?”  
“Not really I just…” Roman for once looked lost for words. Making an effort to construct his next sentences carefully. “Wanted to talk to you and say… I’ve really liked hanging out with you while we worked on this show. I hate to think that the show ending will mean I never get to talk to you again.”  
“I don’t exactly fit in with your other friends.”  
“Those guys are idiots, I’ve been stuck with them since middle school but we’ll graduate soon and maybe… I won’t have to keep acting anymore.” Roman met Logan’s eyes. “You know what I mean. You remember what I said in the lighting room…”  
Logan nodded. “Are you saying you might come out?”  
“What are new starts for?” Roman said with a small smile. “Logan, I can’t ignore my heart any more.”  
“As long as you’re sure, then I’m happy for you. You deserve to be yourself Roman. And the world deserves to see the real you, because he’s pretty amazing.” Logan felt himself slipping into the lovestruck fool he could sometimes be around Roman. Gazing at him when they sat on the edge of the stage together, blushing whenever he made prolonged eye contact, getting goose bumps when their hands brushed against each other. Logan hated feeling that way. It was out of control, unpredictable, heart-breaking. Because even when Roman revealed to Logan in confidence that he was also gay, it didn’t mean that Logan was any closer to a chance of being with him. Roman would want someone handsome and charming, someone with a big personality to match his. Logan wasn’t nearly special enough, so he should really just forget these feelings before he gets even more-  
Logan blinked wondering when in his reel of self deprecating thoughts Roman had gotten so close to him. His face was inches away, Logan could hear his quiet breathing. Logan’s eyes risked a glance at his lips.  
“Logan.” He heard his own name and never thought it sounded so beautiful. Roman reached out and touched Logan’s face. Logan’s breath caught. They moved together in the same moment and collided. Logan got lost in the kiss, indulging in his weakness. He held onto Roman’s waist and pulled him closer, Roman was putting his arms around his neck and brushing his hair with light, adoring fingertips. They parted slowly, exchanging looks of ‘what the hell was that’ in the best way possible.  
“Sanders!” One of Roman’s friends was calling from the corridor, they were going around in a group looking for him. Roman took his hands off Logan and stepped away, smiling awkwardly.  
“I- uh-” Logan stuttered. “I’ll see you on Monday?”  
Roman laughed “You’re cute.” Logan blushed wondering if this was an elaborate end of year prank being played on him.  
“Sanders! There you are! Come on we’re going to the after party and getting drunk as hell!” Roman’s friend called into the room for him. Logan looked at him, expecting this to be the moment where he would leave and they’d never speak of this again.  
“No thanks, I’m not in the party mood. Go on and have fun without me.” Roman said, glancing at Logan with a small smile.  
“Really? Alright then- he said he’s not coming!” The boy ran off to rejoin the chaos and Logan stared at Roman in disbelief.  
“So... wanna get out of here?” Roman asked.

Several years later at the final performance of a different show, Logan was the first to get up in the standing ovation. He clapped along with the audience but when Roman came up to take his bow he whistled and Roman looked over him grinning. Logan smiled back at him, full of pride and he could communicate it with just one look. Roman looked back up and around the cheering crowd before stepping away with a spring in his step. Logan clapped until everyone had bowed and the curtains closed. He shuffled out of his row of seats and went off to the backstage to find his boyfriend.  
Roman came to the door he’d told Logan to meet him at and kissed him upon seeing him, not caring there were women queuing for the restrooms not far away.  
“You were incredible as always.” Logan said.  
“I know.” Roman smirked. “Thank you for coming to see my last show.”  
“I wouldn’t miss it.”  
“Come meet the rest of the cast!” Roman took Logan’s hand and led him backstage. Logan let himself be paraded around being introduced to the cast and crew, them all saying that they’d heard so much about him already from Roman. He smiled and laughed with them all, sharing anecdotes about the person they had in common who they all adored.  
“Are you coming to the after party?” One of them asked.  
“Oh- I think so. We are, right?” Logan looked over at Roman.  
“We can for a bit, I’m a little tired myself for staying out too long.” Roman said. Roman led Logan into his dressing room and they closed the door on the noise outside. Logan snorted in laughter suddenly.  
“What?” Roman asked.  
“Nothing- ...after party.” Logan said and Roman laughed.  
“Oh gosh you’re right. Now that was one incredible after party.”  
“We never went…?”  
“Yeah, but we had a sort of after party just the two of us in my room that night.”  
“Oh that one,” Logan chuckled “Yeah, that was okay.”  
“Hey!” Roman pushed his shoulder playfully. “I’ll have you know that was some of my best work.”  
“You’re making it sound like we did more than make out and lie on your bed talking about our feelings.”  
“Whatever else could I possibly be referring to?” Roman mock-gasped. “Logan has a dirty mind.”  
“Do you ever stop?” Logan rolled his eyes while still smiling affectionately.  
“Nope. You’re stuck with me now, deal with it.” Roman grinned and leaned in to kiss him. Logan wondered if the day would ever come when kissing Roman didn’t feel like those exaggerated, unrealistic romantic comedies. Because as much as he might mock them when Roman put them on Logan believed he was one of the few people lucky enough to experience the dreamy haze of movie love. Maybe it’s because they’d been in the honeymoon phase since high school, maybe it’s because Roman acted like he was the lead of an early 2000s chick flick constantly and that made Logan the dorky love interest. Logan knew he made people sick with how in love he was and he really didn’t care.  
"Screw the party, I just wanna go home and fall asleep in front of the tv…" Roman said sleepily.  
"Whatever happened to my boyfriend, the spontaneous party animal who dragged me out of my room almost every weekend in college?"  
"He's old now. And boring."  
"You could never be that. You've been putting your all into every performance this week and you're exhausted. Come on, let's get you home."  
The two of them went out to the car, Logan got in the driver's side and watched Roman get him beside him, giving him a soft smile.  
"You okay?" He asked.  
"Yeah… I'll miss this show. And of course this means I'm unemployed until I find my next one."  
"You don't have to worry about that now. We'll be fine. I'm proud of you Roman, you knew what you wanted to do and you pursued it."  
"Thank you... following your dreams can still be scary."  
"But if anyone can do it it's you. Believe me I was sceptical at first that you could make acting your career but you definitely proved me wrong. This once I'm not afraid to say it."  
"Aha he admits it! Can you say that again so I can record it and bring it up in future conversations? Go on, say 'I was wrong.'"  
"Shut up." Logan smiled and pulled the car out of the parking lot.  
They drove through the streets, Roman put the radio on and Logan cruised around instead of going directly back to their apartment. "Hey, do you want to go up to the hill?" Logan asked.  
"Oh- yeah, that's such a nice spot." Roman looked over at Logan with a twinkle in his eye. Watching him take them up the hill and park. They got out and sat on the bench to see the view. Roman looked out over the city, the lights illuminating it like a reflection of the starry sky. His heart fluttered as many things came into convenient place in his mind. The last night of his show, just like the last night of his high school show was when they kissed for the first time. The hill, where they'd spent their first night when they moved to the city, lying under the stars and talking about their future. And the way Logan had been looking at him all night. For Roman it could only one thing. He looked down at his hand and pictured the ring he'd been looking at online. He hoped Logan had been picking up his hints, he hadn't exactly been leaving those tabs open on his computer by accident.  
"Roman." Logan said and Roman looked up at him smiling.  
"Yes, mhm- what is it?" He tried to prepare himself for the most important moment of his life.  
"What are you thinking about, you keep drifting off."  
"Oh nothing… just how far we've come. And how much I love you."  
"I love you too." Logan smiled and went back to looking out at the city. Roman's face fell, this wasn't right. Logan was being completely calm, there was no way he wouldn't have any pre-proposal jitters.  
"And we've come so far but I'm really excited about our future too.."  
"Sure, me too." Logan said, and Roman frowned.  
"Like, for instance where do you see us in ten years?"  
"Is this a job interview?"  
"I guess I'm just realising how stagnant we are."  
"What are you talking about?" Now Logan was starting to look worried, but not the kind Roman had been looking for.  
"I mean have we really moved forward since college? It's like we're in this happy little love bubble but nothing changes, it can't be like this forever."  
"Roman we live together. Our schedules revolve around each other- and we've had such a nice evening I don't understand where this is coming from."  
"Sometimes I wish you understood… I wish I didn't have to explain everything to you so this time I won't. You can figure it out yourself." Roman got up, pretending to yawn. "Boy, I really am tired. Shall we go?" Roman got into the car. Logan shook his head, going over every moment that night searching for what he did wrong. Even after all these years he could be completely confused as to what was going on in Roman's mind. He went over to the car and opened the door.  
"I'm sorry." He said. Roman was looking out the window.  
"You don't know what you're apologising for."  
"I know but, I'm sorry that I'm missing something here."  
"It's not your fault, you're not a mind reader. I just don't want to talk about it tonight, is that okay?"  
"Of course." Logan got in and started to drive them home. The city lights flew by and the atmosphere had shifted. Like the forces in their lives were tensing before they would shift and change forever.


	2. The Negative

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: implication of an abusive relationship

“And then he had no idea that you wanted him to propose!?” Elisa shook her head as they settled on the couch together. “Unbelievable.”  
Roman sighed. Elisa was his oldest and closest friend, they met in kindergarten. He shared his fruit snacks with her and that was it, they became inseparable. The rare kind of childhood friends that actually mean it when they say they’ll be together forever. So much so that their families had in their heads that they would grow up to marry each other for a long time. Big disappointments there. They did pretend to date for a while in high school to silence any rumours that Roman was gay… but anyone with a decent enough amount of perception could see through it. Roman was a good actor, but not that good.  
“It’s not his fault, I’ve been hinting and skirting around the topic for too long. I have to be upfront with him, he gets confused otherwise.” Roman poured the wine into two glasses. There was a third left out for Remus who was fashionably late as usual. It was tradition for the three of them to spend Saturday nights together watching Ru Paul’s Drag Race. Roman had been busy with the show but they were back to the routine already. Elisa eyed the glasses.  
“Actually I don’t think I want to drink tonight. I’m- thinking of a detox.”  
“Oh, good for you. Shall I put this away then?”  
“No I don’t mind if you drink, really. I’ll just have a water?”  
“Sure, let me get you one.” Roman went into the kitchen but still called to her since it was only the next room. “So yeah anyway, I just really need to talk to him.”  
“Have you ever considered you could propose to him?”  
“What if he says no? I don’t even know what his stance on marriage is, that’s the problem. Maybe he doesn’t believe in it. Maybe he just sees it as a pointless.. heteronormative social tradition invented by the patriarchy.”  
“Maybe he does but that doesn't mean he doesn't want to marry you. It’s different for you guys, you’re… Roman and Logan.”  
“Very helpful.” Roman set the glass of water on the table and sat back down.  
“You’re meant to be together. I’m sure once you talk to Logan he’ll be as excited about marriage as you.”  
“Hm.” Roman, sipped from his glass thoughtfully. He jolted at the door of the apartment swinging open.  
“Whatup bitches?” Remus had arrived, making his presence known. Roman's scruffy yet endearing younger twin, still in his punk phase that never went away since teenagehood. “I brought donuts!” He placed the box in front of them.  
“Oh you’re an angel.” Elisa grabbed the box, choosing one for herself.  
“Well here we are, the gang’s back together.” Remus came and sat on Elisa’s left. “Though maybe not for long since Elisa’s betraying all of us when she goes off and moves to London.”  
“Come on Rem, it’s sad yes but we have to be happy for her. She’s following her dream of dancing.”  
“Um- guys-” Elisa tried to speak through a mouthful of donut.  
“She can dance here in the states is all I’m saying…” Remus grumbled.  
“This might be one of our last nights together for a while, don’t ruin it by being negative.”  
“Okay, okay. I’m happy for you El really it just won’t be the same after this. Without you it’s just me and Roman squabbling all night.”  
“Only because you have terrible opinions about whatever we’re watching. How can you still not accept Jaida Essence Hall won last season?"  
"I love Jaida, don't get me wrong I just love Crystal more okay!"  
“Guys!” Elisa had swallowed enough to get her words out. “I might… not be leaving after all.”  
“What?” Roman looked at her.  
“Yes! No one leaves, everything’s the same!” Remus cheered.  
“El what happened, you’ve been talking of the move for years why are you backing out now? I thought you’d already found an apartment.” Roman looked at her concerned.  
“Yeah… I uh, just don’t think I can right now.” Elisa looked down blinking and Roman knew she was trying not to cry. Remus simmered down and put an arm around her.  
“Hey… what’s wrong..?” He asked. He could be serious Remus and it’s so rare it just shows how much he cares for someone. When Elisa spoke again her voice cracked.  
“I wasn’t going to tell you guys this. I didn’t want to put a damper on our night but I can’t hold it in.”  
“You can tell us anything, we’re here for you.” Roman shuffled closer and put a hand over hers. She smiled weakly.  
“Well… I was sick this morning. And yesterday, I thought it was the flu at first but then I realised I was late and that’s not normal for me…”  
“Oh, El.” Roman said.  
“Late for what?” Remus asked and they both looked at him. “What?” They watched him slowly figure it out.  
“Every month, anyone with a uterus…” Elisa prompted.  
“Oh, right.. No- I still don’t-”  
“Periods Rem. She’s late.” Roman said.  
“Ooh. So?”  
“Did you skip sex ed or something?”  
“I got the education alright, it just wasn’t in school- wait! I just got it!” Remus gasped “You're pregnant!?” Elisa sighed.  
“It’s likely.”  
“Wow, well what if you are, I mean you could have a baby… I’m sorry I just can’t imagine it.” Roman said. Elisa smiled through the tears that were forming.  
“Me neither. God what am I going to do…” She put her head in her hands and Roman held her to him, looking over at Remus over her shoulder.  
“Uh, El. Is the father… he who must not be named?” Remus asked quietly. Elisa looked up and nodded. “Fuck… this is rough.”  
“And just when I’d thought I’d gotten him out of my life. Just when I thought I could leave that- terrible part of my life behind me, fate says ‘no have another kick in the teeth’” Elisa sniffled. “I mean he’s the only person it could be. If I’m perfectly honest I don't think I'd be happy no matter whose it was but the idea of it being his just.. I can’t deal with it.”  
“Elisa, listen. You’ve gone through so much this past year. You have had so much hurt from when he was around but we're so proud of you for coming through it. I think you've come out of it stronger. But you can let us help you now, we will figure this out together." Roman assured.  
"Okay.." she leaned into him, wiping her face.  
"I mean first of all, are we sure you really are pregnant? Have you taken a test?"  
"Not yet."  
"Well I'll go get one! No point panicking if it's negative!" Remus jumped up.  
"Thanks Rem." Elisa smiled a little watching him grab his coat and bound out the door with newfound purpose. Her and Roman sat in thoughtful silence before he spoke.  
"Elisa… if it is positive, what are you going to do?"  
"I don't know."  
"If you had a kid to raise I would be there all the time supporting you. Middle of the night or early in the morning or getting them to sleep, you name it, I'm there." He said smiling.  
"Thanks, and I know you would. It's just not what I pictured for myself at all. I never wanted to be a mom, it's something I tried to make my parents understand over and over. I don't think any child should be raised by someone who never wanted them- or who couldn't even learn to want them."  
"Whatever you decide I'm going to support you. I hope you know that." Roman said and Elisa nodded.  
"Let's… hope for a negative. Best case scenario, I won't have to decide."

Roman and Remus stood outside the bathroom door.  
"I can't believe this- she could be having a baby- I could be an uncle!" Remus said giddily  
"Shh. She doesn't want to think about it like that. This isn't good news for her Remus. Don't act excited if it turns out it is positive."  
"Okay, okay.. just while I was buying it I had all these thoughts about how cool it would be to have a baby around.. at least I get to be Uncle to your kids one day." Roman huffed a little. "What? Oh no, did something happen with Logan- did you two break up!?"  
"What? No!"  
"Phew- don't scare me like that- I would actually cry."  
"You don't think I would be crying if I ever broke up with Logan?"  
"Stop saying 'if' like that like it could actually happen!!"  
"No- Remus we're not breaking up. We're just in a weird place because… I've been waiting for him to propose and sometimes it really feels like he's going to but he never does and I'm starting to feel like he might never want to."  
"What!? Where is he, let me go beat him up for you."  
"No, we're in something called an adult relationship."  
"Then have you asked him if he wants to get married?"  
"Not… not yet."  
"Some adult relationship."  
"But I will, and we'll figure it out so can we please drop it and focus on Elisa." Roman said and just after he did the bathroom door opened and Elisa stepped out.  
"Now we wait." She said, clasping her hands together anxiously.  
"I'll distract you El! Uh.. oh did you listen to that true crime podcast I sent you?" Remus said and Elisa perked up a little.  
"The one about Jeffery Dahmer? Yeah it was great!"  
"I knew you'd like that one! You should listen to some other episodes by them, those guys are so good."  
"I love the psychological analysis parts." They went on to talk about their favourite serial killers (to learn about). And Roman watched them slightly disturbed but grateful to Remus for finding a good distraction. But pretty soon the timer for two minutes went off on Elisa's phone and they all looked over at the pregnancy test sitting on the bathroom counter. Elisa closed her eyes.  
"I can't do it- someone read it for me-" she said and Remus went to go in when she stopped him with her hand. "No, I need to see for myself." She stood there preparing herself but couldn't make her feet move. She groaned. "I can't- I can't look-"  
"Elisa. We'll all look together, okay?" Roman said and she nodded. She held hands with both of the twins.  
"One," Roman said.  
"Two," Remus added.  
"Three-" Elisa breathed and the three of them stepped into the room and looked down at the test. "...shit."


	3. The Timeline

Logan was mid sentence of explaining one last thing about chemical equations when the bell rang and he could see his class itching to grab their bags and head out the door.  
“That’s all for today then, don’t forget to leave your practice tests in the tray so I can mark them. You’ll get your results on Thursday.” The class started to make their way out the door in idle chatter. One student was the last to put their test on the pile.  
“Mr Thomas, I really don’t think I did well on this.”  
“Oh? Is there something you’d like me to go over with you?”  
“It’s just a lot of the atomic stuff I don’t get, and when it sorta turns into math which I really don’t get… I like chemistry, I just wish I wasn’t so dumb at it.”  
“I have a ban on that word in this class. You’re not dumb, some people just need extra time to have things explained to them. You can come here at lunch any time this week and I’ll help you with it.”  
“Thanks. Is tomorrow okay?”  
“Absolutely. I spend all my lunches in here anyway, I can’t eat with all the other teachers watching me.” The kid laughed a little and noticed something on Logan’s desk.  
“Who’s with you in the photo?”  
“Oh, my boyfriend. He forced me to wear those mickey mouse ears by the way. He said it was all a part of the experience of disneyland.” Logan smiled a little. “I still didn’t get it, but unfortunately I’d do anything for him.” The student’s eyes widened.  
“Woah… well, in that case, I should tell you something. Um, I’m actually non-binary? If you’ve heard of that?”  
“I have. Can I ask what name and pronouns you’d prefer me to use?”  
“It’s my middle name, Elliott, which most people call me anyway. And it’s they/them. But you can just use he/him in class, I’m afraid of it spreading around and me having to explain what being non-binary is to everyone when they probably just want to make fun of me for it.”  
“I understand, at least now I can use your proper pronouns when it’s just the two of us. And when we’re in class I’ll try not to use pronouns at all if I have to speak about you.”  
“Thanks Mr Thomas. Wow, all this time and I never knew you were gay.” Elliott said and Logan chuckled.  
“I’ve gotten away with anyone figuring out my secret for this long. But for similar reasons as you I’d prefer you not to tell everyone about it. I could do without answering a whole lot of unwanted questions as well.”  
“Of course, I won’t say anything. Well, guess I’ll see you tomorrow.” Elliott waved a little and shrugged their backpack over their shoulder as they left the room.  
“See you tomorrow, Elliott.” Logan smiled a little. It was times like this he remembered why he became a teacher. He took the photo in his hands and sighed a little. He had to go talk to him. He was glad of it being the end of the day, he gathered his things together quickly before leaving the classroom.

He entered their apartment and saw Roman's friend Elisa napping on their couch. He quietly moved past her looking for Roman, eventually finding him in the study.  
"Hey, Elisa's here?" He asked, Roman spun around in the desk chair.  
"Oh- yeah. She came over today to talk and she's taking a nap if that's okay. She was crying and I suggested she should lie down for a while."  
"Of course it's okay, Is she alright?"  
"She's… pregnant."  
"Oh… gosh.."  
"Yep."  
"She was supposed to be moving to London to join the Royal Ballet."  
"Yeah…"  
"Is she keeping it or..?"  
Roman sighed. "We were going over her options. She doesn't want to be a mom. And so that leaves us with an abortion or she goes through with the pregnancy and gives the baby up for adoption. And she still hasn't decided on that." Roman gestured to the screen. "I was doing some research to help for when she wakes up. It is a massive decision and I want to help if I can." Logan came over and put a hand on Roman's shoulder, looking at the screen.  
"It's because you're such a good friend."  
"After everything she's done for me she deserves all this and so much more." Logan looked down at him. He looked so stressed and tired, he'd probably stayed up most of the night worrying about his friend and lied in the morning when he told Logan he'd slept well. Logan kissed the top of his head before pulling up a chair.  
"Luckily for you, researching for people is my love language. Let's have a look, shall we?" He got to work making a document to properly display their findings. Roman looked over at him smiling.  
"I'm sorry for Friday, I was in a bad mood for something that had nothing to do with you." He said.  
"Really?"  
"Really. I love exactly where we are." Roman squeezed Logan's hand. What mattered was Logan, a ring was just a ring, he told himself.

In truth, Logan had a ring. It had been sitting in his filing cabinet for nearly a month, the only place in the house he knew Roman wouldn't look. When they were in their last year of college, Logan was lying beside Roman in bed and as he watched his breaths rise and fall he knew that this man was the only one he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. So he quietly got up, went over to his desk and got out some paper and a pen and drew a timeline. A list of milestones he wanted them to have and the rough areas of time they should fall into. Gay marriage wasn't even legal when he made it, yet he put it on the page anyway. Believing progress would be on his side by the time they were in their mid twenties. So it went: graduate, move in together, get stable jobs (which in Roman's case turned out to be not very stable but reliable the more he made a name for himself and very rewarding), get engaged, plan wedding, get married, move into an actual house, start a family by adoption or surrogacy, or whatever means they ended up choosing. Finally, as Logan finished his little wishlist he imagined he and Roman growing old together. Retiring, taking the time to travel, having the kids and the grandkids over for the holidays. Sitting on a front porch as the sunset, reminiscing over their many, many memories together. That was what Logan wanted. At the time he thought it was silly to think so far into the future when they were so young and sure, anything could happen in between to mess up these plans. But Logan folded up the paper and put it in his wallet.

Now, if he was still going by the timeline he should have really proposed already. But the longer he waited the more he had built it up, the harder it was to go through with. He couldn't even think of how he would ask anymore, everything seemed too simple or too elaborate. Too much or not enough. He started to hope Roman would be his wonderful, spontaneous self and get down on one knee out of nowhere and ask for the both of them but that didn't seem to be happening. Logan was stuck, he needed serious help.

He looked into the living room and saw Elisa was sleepily sitting up.  
"Elisa?" He came over and sat down on the armchair.  
"Oh, hey Logan. Guess I've been asleep a while if you're here. Sorry about that."  
"Don't be sorry. Are you feeling any better?"  
"I guess I'm less panicky, yeah." She smiled a little.  
"Do you want some tea?"  
"That would be great." Logan went away and brought her back some tea and toast.  
"Thank you." She bit into a piece gratefully.  
"I can make you something more filling in a bit."  
She paused looking at him. "So… I'm guessing Roman told you about me."  
"Yes, I hope that was okay."  
"It is, it is." She looked down at her hands. "I'm still.. processing it myself."  
"Roman wants to do all he can to support you, and I will as well."  
"Well.. I think I've decided."  
"Really? Because we made a pros and cons list with a bunch of sources and helpful information for each side if you want to see."  
She laughed softly. "Sorry you have to see it go to waste. But I'm having the baby and giving it up for adoption."  
"Okay. Are you sure?"  
"Yes. I've recently gone into therapy, and I'm doing a lot to self heal and improve the state of my mental health. Because I know now, I stayed with my ex for so long because I truly believed I deserved what he did to me. But in a way… I think I can turn this situation into a positive. I can be strong for this baby, I can take care of myself and them. Then, I can give them to some people who really want and will love them. I can move on knowing I've done a good thing, a miraculous thing. Bringing life into the world. And then once they're born I can go to London and close this chapter on my life for good."  
Logan nodded. "That sounds like such a noble and brave thing to do."  
"I'm actually feeling really good about it. Again sorry you didn't get to give me the rundown on your research."  
"No time spent on research is wasted. In fact now I can do even more research into the adoption process, you need to know a lot going into it to be able to select the best parental unit possible."  
"Thanks Logan. Have I mentioned recently how happy I am you're dating my best friend?"  
"That means a lot, I never knew if you approved of me."  
"Of course I do. I've been with bad people Logan I can tell what a good relationship looks like just by comparison."  
"Right… Elisa? Can I ask you something?"  
"Of course." Logan glanced at the door but Roman didn't seem to be nearby, he lowered his voice anyway.  
"Do you have any idea.. how Roman would want to be proposed to?" Elisa grinned.  
"My friend, he doesn't care how. You could propose to him anywhere and I know he'd say yes." Logan breathed a little in relief.  
"Really?"  
"Really, Logan. I think all he's worried about is that you might not propose at all."  
"Why would he think that…" Logan slowly put the pieces together and put a hand to his face. "-the 'are we moving forward' talk, I'm so oblivious. He's worried I don't want to marry him and that living together is as far as we'll get."  
"Yup."  
"Well that's not true! I have- I have a whole thing- wait here-" Logan went and got his wallet and found the folded up piece of paper, handing it to Elisa. She smiled as she read it.  
"Aw Logan.. when did you make this?"  
"In college. I had to write it down so I could make it come true. Like a to-do list but- way more important. I've added things over the years like whenever I seen a place that could be a wedding venue… or- looked them up directly- I noted it down. And I know Roman will want to plan most of the wedding, he's way more creative than me but if I had any ideas I wrote them down, I even started thinking about my vows and put down some things I definitely want to say so I don't forget. I also started thinking about, where we might live, where the best places are to find a house and start a family."  
"Are these baby names?"  
"Uh- I just noted it down if one came to me… okay I may have looked up baby name websites once or twice but of course having kids is far down the timeline, I didn't feel I had to worry about it as much as the other stuff."  
"Logan…" Elisa smiled and looked up at him. "I know exactly how you should propose."


	4. The Big Question

It's hard to pinpoint when Roman first met Logan. He vaguely remembers seeing him around school in the hallways but he blended into the crowd. He had one class with him the first year but they were on opposite sides of the classroom. They had a couple more classes over the next few years and Roman is sure at some point he must've asked him for a pen or if he'd done the homework or something. But he can't remember because he hadn't really noticed him yet. He remembers exactly when first really noticed Logan.  
He and Elisa were talking at their locker one school morning. Roman in his preppy outfits that usually heavily featured red, Elisa in all black. She considered herself a lazy goth, too unbothered to fully commit to the look. That morning Roman was singing the entirety of 'Wannabe' By the Spice Girls under his breath.   
“If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends-”  
“Ro, stop it’s gonna be stuck in my head all day!”  
“I can’t help myself!” Roman was laughing at Elisa’s annoyed reaction when he noticed some commotion down the hall. It was a group of thugs from the football team following some boy around.  
“Where are you going Logan?”  
“Come on let us walk you to class.” One of them put a hand on his shoulder and the kid flinched at being touched.  
“Please, just leave me alone.” Logan said quietly.  
“What? We’re not doing anything.”  
“Don’t be so sensitive, we just wanted to congratulate you on your news.”  
“Go on tell us, how many guys do you see in this school that you just want to suck their dicks?” The jock knocked his books out of his hands. “Freak.”  
“Hey!” Roman marched up to them, barely containing the fury in his face.  
“What do you want, Sanders?” Dale Sullivan, the biggest of them, sneered at him. The jocks hated Roman because he was popular. He got way more attention from girls than them. Mostly because he was actually friends with them rather than creepily coming on to them all the time.  
“I want you guys to stop being assholes and leave him alone!”  
“What are you going to do about it, drama queen? Oh I see, are you defending your boyfriend here?”  
“No, I simply have a human conscience have you heard of it? I hate that this will work but if you don’t leave him alone right now I’ll make sure not a single one of you gets a date to homecoming. And that sure looks bad, the all powerful Northfield Knights walking into that gymnasium alone. No girl will dance with you and so you’ll have to end up dancing with each other to save face and doesn’t that sound gay to you?” Roman folded his arms watching their irritated defeated faces.  
“You think you’re so special Sanders, but you’re the biggest loser in this whole school.” Sullivan pushed past him and his football gang followed behind like obedient drones. Roman turned his attention to Logan who was picking up his books and all the papers that had fallen out of them.  
“Here let me help.” Roman bent down to help him. Logan flustered with getting everything back quickly as if afraid of being an inconvenience.  
“You have nothing to apologise for- thank you.”  
“Any decent person would’ve done the same.” Roman looked up to hand a book to Logan and that’s when he noticed him. Really looked and saw this pretty faced brunette with glasses as if  
seeing him for the very first time. He was smaller and thinner than Roman was, Roman hated to think what could’ve happened if he hadn’t stepped in.  
“Clearly there aren’t enough decent people then, you’re the only one who said anything.” Logan said quietly. Roman picked up the last of his stuff and helped him up.  
“Are you okay?”  
“Sure, fine. Don’t worry about me.” Logan looked down at their hands touching as Roman handed the last of the papers over. Roman pulled his hand away shyly and smiled at him.  
“Well if you ever have any problems with those guys just tell me. Or my brother Remus can always help.”  
“No offense Roman but I think the only thing saving you from getting beat up yourself is your popularity and the fact we’re in a crowded hallway.”  
“I know, I just wanted to-” Roman was cut off by the school bell.  
“Yeah… thanks for the help but if you haven’t heard I’m a gay kid in this small Floridian town, there’s going to be bullies and I can handle it. See you in Spanish, Roman. Adiós.” Logan walked away and Roman’s eyes followed him all the way down the hall. Elisa sidled up beside him.  
“Hm, I never even knew he was gay before the rumours started going around.” She said.  
“Me neither…” Roman said, “You know, I’ve seen him around but I’ve never really talked to him before.”  
“Maybe you should. He doesn’t have many friends.”  
“I think I will.” Roman smiled a little, watching Logan struggling to balance his books, most of which were not for school. “What a nerd.” He’s said affectionately.

“So either you’re kidnapping me or you have some kind of surprise planned.” Roman sat blindfolded in the car as Logan drove.  
“You’ve got me. It was embarrassingly easy to kidnap you, all I said was get in the car and put the blindfold on you.” Logan said, smiling to himself.  
“You were very convincing. Roman said. “Am I allowed to know where we’re going?”  
“No, that’s the whole point of the secrecy. All I’ll say is, you always do the romantic gestures and initiate the emotional stuff. Will you let me take the reins this time?”  
“Of course.” Roman smiled, waiting patiently. He knew they were driving for a while but he had no idea in what direction. Eventually Logan parked and came and opened the door for him.  
“Now keep it on until I say so okay?”  
“Okay.” Roman let himself be led, holding onto Logan’s arm. He had that feeling again, the anticipation. And if he wasn’t mistaken he could hear it in Logan’s voice too. He heard Logan opening a door for them and they went inside somewhere. They were walking, then they went up a couple steps and Logan led him to a spot before stopping him.  
“Okay, here.” Logan let go of him. “You can look.” Roman removed the blindfold.  
“No.. way.” They were in their old high school auditorium, right in the middle of the stage. Roman laughed, looking around. “Oh my God, how did you get us in here?”  
“Pulled some strings with the janitor- it’s not important.”  
“Are those..? The scenery boards from Into the Woods?” Roman walked over to them. “I can’t believe they kept these.”  
“Probably to save money, they bring them out if they ever have a forest scene again.”  
“Logan we painted this one together!”  
“I know..” Logan smiled and came over to it. On the unpainted side they found the little marks they’d made. Roman had painted a little crown and the words “Prince Roman was here!”. Logan had come back later and written underneath it in marker “Logan did most of the work.” Roman laughed looking up at him.  
“Doesn’t it feel like it was only yesterday, and a million years ago at the same time?” he said and Logan nodded.  
“That’s what being with you is like. Like I’ve known you forever and that we’re just starting out because you make every moment new and exciting."  
"Aw, Lo. What's brought all this on?" Roman asked and Logan took his hand leading him back to the stage where there was a blanket set down, some lit candles and a wicker hamper. Roman smiled wide.  
"Just like our first anniversary.." He sat down on it with Logan.  
"Okay, I have some things to give to you and some things to say. Are you ready because this is about to get very sappy." Logan asked and Roman nodded happily.  
"I like sappy." Logan opened the basket and got out an old copy of "To Kill a Mockingbird".  
"This is one of the books I was carrying when you helped me in the hall. In some ways I'm almost grateful to Dale Sweeney without him you never would've noticed me."  
"I would've noticed you at some point.." Roman said but a little unsure. He could be so unobservant what if he had gone through high school and never met Logan, where would he be without him?  
"Turn to page 50. That's where I was up to that day." Roman turned the page and grinned seeing Logan's handwriting. He'd annotated the page with "Roman Sanders talked to me!"  
"Do you have any idea how long I'd been crushing on you before that day?" Logan said, blushing a little. He'd never thought he'd ever expose his young gay heart like that.  
"No idea, but am I glad I set my sights on you." Roman smirked.  
Next Logan pulled out a set of clothes. Roman saw the sash and gasped.  
"Is that.. my Prince costume!?"  
"Not the exact one. It's a replica I had made in your size." Logan said, watching Roman take it with shock and awe on my face.  
"This is unreal…"  
"Can you put it on please?"  
"Try and stop me!" Logan chuckled at Roman ran off into the wings and came back minutes later dressed in the costume. It was better made than the old one from high school, this one was far more refined and detailed. Logan marvelled at how Roman wore it like he was born to. Like he was a real fantasy prince in another life.  
"What do you think?" Roman said, giving a little turn.  
"I think you're gorgeous." Roman blushed and sat back down.  
"I can't believe you did this.."  
"There's more hold on." Logan got out a large book, it looked like a blank scrapbook. He handed it to Roman. "This is a book of memories I want us to start together. If you'll look, I've already made a start on some pages." Roman started turning slowly through and felt tears welling up in the emotions it was all bringing out. There were pictures of the two of them, tickets and programs from Roman's shows including the production of "Into the Woods" that started it all. There were captions under each picture, things like "First Vacation", "Graduation" but some were more meaningful like a candid shot Remus took of them looking into each other's eyes with the caption: "Whenever I look at you, I'm home."  
"Logan.." Roman shook his head and had to put the book down so his tears wouldn't fall on it.  
"Elisa helped me with some of the collaging and decorating."  
"It's beautiful." Roman sniffled, wiping his face, Logan already had a tissue to hand him.  
"Here." Logan turned to a blank page. "Is where we'll make new memories together. There's so much of the book left to fill because there's so much we're going to do. I've kept this list in my wallet for four years now, I wrote it in college. It was a rough, very optimistic timeline of the ideal life I wanted to have with you someday. Because even then I knew I wanted you in my life forever. As my partner, as my best friend and one day, as my husband." Logan said. "Now I think you know what's coming…"  
"I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about." Roman said with a knowing smile, starting to cry all over again. "But I'm going to ask for no reason whatsoever if you're recording this." Logan nodded.  
"There's a camera pointed at the stage over there."  
"Oh yes I see it. Well good, because if for some reason something really good happens right now, I'm going to need that tape to look back on for years and years." Roman said. "Now what were you going to ask me?"  
"I never said I was asking you anything."  
"Logan Thomas, the love of my life, you've tortured me long enough." Logan chuckled.  
"There's one last thing in the basket." He reached in and took out a small box and opened it to show the gold ring that was inside with some small glittering rubies set into it. Roman gasped quietly, all joking aside he really never knew for sure if this moment would come. And now it had. Logan held the ring and looked into Roman's eyes, getting emotional himself.  
"Roman, you are the single most incredible person I know. You're kind, passionate, loving, you have a creative mind that astounds me everyday and you're so talented. I'm a different person around you because you make me want to be a better person. I once thought I'd be incapable of a committed romantic relationship like this one. Partly because I didn't think love could even last, partly because I didn't think anyone would want me. But loving you, it makes me happier than I ever thought I could be. All I want is a long, wonderful life with you. Prince Roman Sanders, will you make me the happiest man alive and marry me?" By the time Logan asked the question he was tearful but he'd finally said it. Roman could barely contain himself with joy.  
"Yes- yes!" He sprang forward and practically tackled Logan to the ground in a hug, the two of them in a fit of giggles mixed with tears. Roman kissed Logan passionately and Logan wrapped his arms around him, running one hand through his hair. When they could finally get off each other, they sat up again. Roman eyed the camera.  
"We might have to edit that one when we show it to family." They both laughed some more.  
"I'm sorry for keeping you waiting." Logan said.  
"Logan, this was so worth the wait. You are worth it." Roman put on his ring smiling wide and grabbed Logan's tie to pull him in for another kiss.  
"I love you, my Prince." Logan said with an adoring smirk.  
"I love you more, nerd."


	5. Baby Fever

Roman leaned against the door watching Remus in action. Remus had many gigs, he was never going to be tied down to one job. He played drums in a band, he gave drum lessons, he had a van if people needed gear moving around. And he was a party pirate. It started with a bouncy castle, he bought one and people would hire it for the day for a party and Remus would bring it over in his van for the kids to play on. But Remus being himself he couldn't simply wait in the van, go away for a couple hours or have a drink with the adults while the kids played. He joined in, going feral, making up games, getting all the kids to follow him around like excited puppies. They all instantly loved him and he found that he loved hanging with kids, so much more fun than boring old grown ups. He started getting hired simply because the parents heard how good he was with the kids. He realised he could make it into a business of its own.  
Remus stood in his full pirate get up in the middle of the indoor play area, the kids gathered around him attentively.  
"Aright maties, it's time for you young pirates to help me find my lost treasure. Are you ready?" He asked and they all jumped around giddily.  
"Yeah!!" They chorused.  
"Arr! That's what I like to hear! Now the birthday boy gets to read out the first clue. Read it and it'll lead you to the next one until you find where my treasure is hidden." Remus set them off on their scavenger hunt, running around the playgym and looking for clues, with some parents help. Roman smiled and came over to his brother the pirate.  
"How's it going Captain Squidbrain?" He said.  
"It's Squidbeard! How are ya matey, what brings you here?"  
"You're still doing the voice."  
"It's 'ard to stop. Besides I can't let one of the kiddies hear me talking like a no good land lubber can I?" Remus said and Roman chuckled, shaking his head. He was glad at least to see Remus so happy. He sure wasn't happy when he was a teenager, or for several years after that. His unhappiness made him rebel, stay out late sometimes disappear for a whole night. He'd been arrested for underage drinking and vandalism. There was a time when for Remus he could've gone down a very different path. When drugs controlled his life he might have not been able to get free. Roman didn't know exactly what triggered him to become sober and make such a good life for himself but he's ever glad he did.  
"Well Captain, take a look at this treasure." Roman held up his ring with a smug smile. Remus's pirate act dropped, his jaw dropped and then he burst into a grin.  
"He did it!? He proposed!"  
"Yeah!"  
"Oh Roman I'm so happy for you!" Remus grabbed his brother in a hug and Roman hugged back while feeling the circulation stop in his body.  
"Ow-" Roman laughed "You're crushing me."  
"Don't care! My brother's getting married! My brother's getting married!!"  
"I know- ah-" Roman finally pulled free, unable to hide his smile at Remus's excited reaction. "I can barely believe it myself…"  
"Dude- this is so great, you're getting married- Logan's going to be my brother-in-law! The next time I see him I'm gonna- oh I'm gonna tackle hug him."  
"I'll warn him then."  
"It's still happening!!" Roman laughed.  
"Rem. Will you be my best man?"  
"Do you even have to ask? Of course!" And soon enough Roman was in another death grip hug.  
"Captain Squidbeard! I found another clue, can you help?" A little boy ran up to him and Remus quickly had to return to his pirate persona.  
"Of course matey! I'll be right with ya!" He turned back to Roman. "Do you want to wait around till the end of the party, we could get dinner after to celebrate!"  
"Sure, I'll just be over here. Go do your thing Captain." Roman smiled and went to sit down on a chair with the parents. He glanced over at the dad next to him. He was a cheerful looking guy with glasses dressed in sky blue. He was paying half his attention on whichever kid was his running around the hall and the tiny baby sleeping in the stroller. Roman looked over softly. He loved babies. Whenever he saw one it felt like his heart was melting. Not only were they adorable and precious they were bundles of potential. Everyday could be a new first them, the world through their eyes was a giant jungle ready to be explored.  
"They're so sweet, what's their name?" Roman said leaning over, the dad smiled at him.  
"This is Sierra."  
"How old is she?"  
"Two months, can you believe it." The dad looked down at her adoringly. "The time is going too fast, it feels like she was born yesterday." He looked up at the kids at the party and pointed out a blonde boy searching the play area with some other kids. "And that's our five year old, Micah. Who's yours?"  
"Oh- oh no, I'm not a dad." Roman laughed nervously at the thought. "No, I'm with the pirate, he's my brother."  
"Ah, I see." The dad smiled. "I'm Patton Lovejoy."  
"Hi. Roman Sanders." He said. They turned as they heard crying coming from the stroller, little Sierra had woken up.  
"It was only a matter of time. Come here, sweetheart" Patton said, picking her up to soothe her. Roman watched her in amazement. She was so small and had only been in the world for six weeks and yet so alert, looking around with big curious eyes. Patton was able to calm her down and got out a bottle from the bag.  
"Roman, is there any way you could hold her while I go warm this up?" He asked. Roman started panicking inside but held it in.  
"Sure, uh.. what do I do?" He held out his arms and Patton placed Sierra safely in them, making sure Roman was supporting her head.  
"She'll be fine for a few minutes, if she fusses there are pacifiers in the front pocket of the bag and she loves her unicorn." Patton held up the small unicorn plushie in the stroller.  
"Uh- Okay." Roman said, afraid to move a muscle with such a small delicate thing in his arms.  
"Thank you so much, I'll be back soon!" Patton said and went off to the kitchen to use the hot water. Roman looked down at the baby he'd been left to protect. She was making some cries at not being able to see her dad but Roman didn't want to resort to the pacifier right away.  
"It's okay, Sierra. Your daddy will be back soon. In the meantime, you have me and Mr Unicorn." He held up the toy and she made clumsy attempts to grab it, putting one of it's hooves in her mouth. Roman chuckled, putting on a voice for Mr Unicorn. "Hey don't eat me Sierra! I'm your friend!" Sierra blinked up at Roman and made a face Roman swore was a smile.  
"Did you just- hey, are you smiling? Hi.." Roman smiled back making Mr Unicorn dance around making Sierra follow him around her eyes. Roman felt warm inside.. like his heart was glowing. He couldn't help the thought creeping into his mind, however inconvenient and out of place it was: 'I want one..'

Patton soon returned and took Sierra back to be fed.  
"Thank you for waiting, baby girl."  
"She was perfect." Roman said, watching her drink from her bottle. Patton glanced over at him.  
"Can I ask, is that an engagement ring?"  
"Oh, yeah! I got engaged just last weekend actually."  
"Well congratulations, that's so exciting."  
"Yeah.." Roman looked down at the ring for the millionth time. "We're really happy.." He looked back at Patton. He was almost certain but you can't really know for sure. "I'm.. marrying a man by the way."  
"I figured." Patton smiled. "So did I."  
"Oh, great." Roman looked pleased with himself and his accurate gaydar.  
"He should be coming by soon.." Patton looked down at Sierra. "Are you looking out for Dad?"  
"Patton." The two of them looked up and saw the dad in question coming over to them. A tall man in a suit, smiling to see his family. He sat next to Patton looking over at Sierra.  
"Janus.."  
"You heated it in a bowl of hot water right- you know she takes it easier that way."  
"Yes, I did."  
"Good, and this one is right on time, did she nap?"  
"She did, for almost the whole first half of the party."  
"That's my girl." He put an arm around Patton and smiled down at her. He seemed to suddenly notice Roman and his face fell a little, as if he was usually only like this when he and his family were alone. "Hello."  
"Hey, I'm Roman. I was just talking to your husband while I wait for my brother to finish working. Your daughter is amazing by the way, she's was smiling up at me earlier-"  
"Hold on, she smiled for you?"  
"Yes? That wasn't her first smile was it?"  
"No, but I always miss her smiling.." Janus sighed. "Why won't she smile for me?? She basically hates me."  
"That's not true Jan, she doesn't even know what it means she's just copying the faces she sees." Patton looked up and saw Micah running over to them.  
"Dad!" He ran to Janus who picked him up and put him on his knee.  
"Hey buddy, have you been having fun?" He asked.  
"Yeah, look what I found in the treasure hunt!" He held up his bag of chocolate coins.  
"Wow, you're a real pirate now huh?"  
"Yeah!" Janus chuckled.  
"How much longer do these things last?" Janus asked.  
"They're cutting the cake soon, then we can go home."  
"Great." Janus leaned over and kissed Patton on the cheek. Roman looked at the four of them, so happy. So complete… he was sure him and Logan would have that one day. But how long would Logan want to wait? It had taken them seven years to get engaged. Roman thought about the auditions he'd seen, none of them interesting or right for him. He thought about Elisa, making an appointment with the social workers to arrange giving her baby away… 

"Logan I think we should adopt the baby." Roman blurted it out. The thought that had been going around and around in his mind for the past four hours. Logan looked up from the papers he was grading.  
'...What?"  
"Elisa's baby? We should adopt them."  
"No, I heard what you said, just… what?"  
"Look I know it's crazy- and sudden-" Roman was pacing around the kitchen. "Like most gay couples can plan when things like this happen, but Elisa sure wasn't planning on getting pregnant. And the more I think about it, I don't think I can stand by and see my best friend's baby go off to live with some strangers! They could be anyone and we don't know if they'll really take care of and love and make a good home for them like we could!"  
"Roman you're crying.." Logan got up and came over to him.  
"I'm sorry I just… when I saw that family today. I had a feeling, this gut feeling inside that there's one more dream left for me. And I can't let it slip away when it's right there." Roman said in a choked up voice. "Am I making any sense?" Logan wiped Roman's tears away and held his face.  
"You are. But this is a huge thing, we need to take some time to think about it."  
"I know. But… you're thinking about it?"  
"It's very fast, we only just got engaged."  
"I know but Elisa's pregnant now, we have 8 months to think about. Less because we should have decided before it comes."  
"You should also ask Elisa about this, she gets to decide who her baby goes to."  
"I know…" Roman sighed and Logan put his arms around him, stroking his hair.  
"You're really torn up about this aren't you?"  
"It's all I've been able to think about since I saw that baby at the birthday party."  
"What did you say the parents names were?"  
"Patton and Janus Lovejoy. Patton works at a bakery, even though he's taking time off for the baby, he gave me their card if we wanted to use them for the wedding cake." Roman found it in his pocket and gave it to Logan.  
"Maybe we should talk to them, they've already been through this before.." Logan said and Roman smiled at him. He didn't want to say anything to jinx it, but he knew Logan was going to be thinking about it. Once you plant something in Logan Thomas's mind he can't get it out until he assesses every possible conclusion.


	6. The Lovejoys

Janus walked into the bakery five years ago, having no expectation that his life would change forever. Seeing no one at the counter he rang the desk bell and looked around expectantly.  
"Coming, I'm coming!!" He heard a voice from inside the kitchen. There was some banging around going on, clanking of metal and in a flurry of flour the baker appeared. "Sorry about that." He came over to the counter, face flushed.  
"Is everything alright back there?" Janus asked, trying to disguise his amusement.  
"Oh- fine I just was clumsy enough to make a huge mess in there. Been trying to clean it up until my boss gets back- she's nice and probably won't mind but I'm trying to prove I'm capable to run the shop on my own. Anyway! Are you picking up or ordering?"  
"Uh, I wanted to order a birthday cake for my friend." Janus said and Patton got out a notepad to write down the order.  
"What size? If it's for a party you can get a large or a medium for just a few people is about this big.” Patton gestured the sizes with his hands.  
"That would be fine, he doesn't want a big party but getting him a cake is the least I can do for him."  
"That's so nice you're thinking of him." Patton smiled. "Any flavours you know he likes?"  
"Dark chocolate?"  
"Perfect."  
"And can you do designs like this?" Janus pointed to the example cakes in the display case.  
"Sure what did you have in mind?"  
"He really likes that movie 'The Nightmare Before Christmas' do you know it?"  
"Yeah! Great movie!"  
"Could you make it look like that one scene-"  
"With Jack and Sally on the big swirly cliff thing?"  
"Yes." Janus smiled at Patton so easily finishing his thought. Patton wrote down the information.  
"We can do that. Anything else?"  
"No, I've had cake from here before I trust you know what you're doing." Patton smiled at that and put the total into the machine for Janus to pay.  
"You can pick it up any time after 12 tomorrow." He said but Janus didn't seem to be leaving.  
"Do you… need help with cleaning up the mess? Maybe if I help we can have it done by the time your boss gets back." He asked.  
"Oh, you don't have to do that."  
"I know but I want to." Janus said, surprising even himself. All he knew was he didn't want to go out the door right now. He wanted to keep talking to this cute, funny guy and he'd make up any excuse right now to do it.  
"If you're sure… thank you." Patton looked at him warmly. He stuck out his hand over the counter. “I’m Patton Lovejoy by the way.”  
Janus shook his hand. “Janus D’Angelo”

Logan looked down at the address he had been given by the woman at the bakery and back up at the door. This was it. But however many reassurances she’d given him that they’d be happy to have visitors and answer any questions, he felt like he was intruding. He swallowed his nervousness and knocked on the front door. Janus opened the door and looked Logan up and down.  
“Can I help you?” He asked.  
“Hello, sorry to bother you. My name’s Logan, you don’t know me but my fiance met you and your husband last week at the birthday party and seeing your baby made Roman want to adopt himself- he has in his head that we should start a family right away and I want to be supportive but I don’t know how to be and I know this is none of your business but I don’t know anyone I could talk to about this and the lady at the bakery said you wouldn’t mind…” Logan looked up at Janus who didn’t look very welcoming. Logan sighed. “I’m sorry, this was- a bad idea. I’ll leave you alone now. Again, sorry for bothering you.” He started to walk down the garden path.  
“Wait.” He heard Janus’s voice and turned back around. Janus stepped to the side and gestured to Logan to come inside.  
“Thank you.” Logan came into the house before Janus could change his mind.  
“It’s my husband you’ll want to talk to, he’s the one who doesn’t mind putting everything on hold for a needy stranger on our doorstep.” Janus said saltily. He led Logan into the family room where Patton was watching Micah who was playing with Lego on the carpet. “This is that guy from the party’s fiance, Logan, he’s panicking about being a dad.”  
“I wouldn’t say I’m panicking-”  
“Oh well that’s okay Logan it can be a scary thing, would you like to sit down and talk about it?” Patton asked and Logan nodded, taking a seat. “Would you like some tea? Jan can you make us some?”  
“Anything for you, darling.” Janus smiled and went off to the kitchen. Logan was watching the little boy building a Lego tower. How could he ever be ready…  
"Logan? Why don't you start from the beginning." Patton said. So Logan did. He talked about his timeline, how he'd finally been able to propose and thought him and Roman were moving in the right direction. He told Patton about Roman's friend Elisa getting pregnant and giving the baby up for adoption.  
"And then last week Roman suddenly started saying we should be the ones to adopt the baby. He says he won't be able to live with himself if he doesn't make sure they go to a good home and he thinks we can provide one. I don't know.. I've always tried to be supportive of his dreams. But this one might actually be too big. And maybe Roman just likes the idea of being a parent. Maybe he isn't ready. I know I'm not."  
"Well Roman it is a big decision that you both have to think about. The thing about being prepared is, you can never be prepared for what parenthood will bring no matter where you are in life. It changes everything. Though I think…" Patton looked up at Micah. "Micah sweetie do you want to go play upstairs for a bit?"  
"Can I go on the ipad?" He asked.  
"Sure, you can play on it until dinner." Patton said and Micah got up.  
"I'm gonna watch Steven Universe." He said and went upstairs. Once he was gone Patton turned back to Logan.  
"You see, we weren't exactly planning on all this either. A year ago we decided we wanted to foster a child, there are so many kids in the system and if we could help just one that would be a big help. But almost as soon as we met Micah we knew he was a part of our family for good. His biological mother was deemed unfit and is now in prison- for reasons not just about him so we were able to file for adoption and have full custody of him. Then we found out that Micah's mom was pregnant. The baby would be taken away and placed into the system as soon as she was born but this was Micah's sister, we knew we had to take her too. So, we adopted both of them and in the span of a year we have a five year old and a new born baby to raise."  
"Wow.. how- how do you handle that? How do you change your entire life so easily?"  
"It wasn't easy at all." Patton said but began to smile. "We made room in our lives to them because we had to. For me and Janus as soon as we saw those kids they were ours and we would do anything for them. It's an instant connection you can't understand unless you have your own child. Which might happen for you.. someday."  
"Someday…"  
"I see where some of Roman's worries lie about his friend's baby. The system can be wonderful for creating many forever homes but there's still a risk of a child being left in the system without finding a home willing to adopt them. And that can really affect them negatively in a lot of ways. Some children never get to experience growing up in a home where they're loved and supported unconditionally." Patton said and Logan nodded deep in thought.  
"I hadn't thought about that. You know Roman hasn't been in close contact with his family since he started college? He came out that previous summer and… it was horrible watching them completely disregard him if as he was never their son. He tried with them, he tried to change their minds but they cut him and his brother Remus off completely. When it comes to family, Roman and Remus only have each other now. For Roman to think about a child being abandoned like he was, of course he would want to make the loving supportive home he never had…"  
"Logan, you're Roman's family now too. Family is the people you choose to have close around you to love and care for and who love and care for you. It sounds like you have a pretty wonderful family between you already and in time it'll only grow."  
"Thank you Patton.. how did you get so good at this, you've just met me, you didn't have to be so kind." Logan said and Patton smiled warmly.  
"I'm only saying what I would've said to my past self if I could." Janus came back from the kitchen and placed cups of tea on the table in front of them.  
"Are we feeling better, stranger whose fiance I met once at a kids birthday party?" Janus asked and Logan sipped his tea nervously.  
"He's not a stranger anymore, he's our new friend." Patton said.  
"Do we really need any more friends, I used to keep my circle small before I met you. But you'll just befriend- or basically adopt anyone you meet."  
"We need to keep these ones around, they're basically going through the same thing we went through and they need our help. And it's not my fault I have so much love to give."  
"Couldn't you just give all your love to me and forget about everyone else?"  
"Janus."  
"Kidding! I'm kidding. Of course we'll help the clueless new dads."  
"And Sierra will still be a close age to their baby when they're born! They could be friends!"  
"We still haven't decided if we're adopting." Logan reminded them. They all heard a cry both from upstairs and from the baby monitor on the table.  
"That's Sierra up from her nap, I'll get her." Janus said and went upstairs. When he came back he had little Sierra in his arms, rocking her gently as she started to calm down. Janus sat down and Logan got a look at her.  
"Yep. I get it now, this is the most precious baby I've ever seen. Who wouldn't want to adopt their friend's baby she's giving up for adoption after seeing that."  
"You just have that effect on people don't you Sierra?" Janus said looking at her, smiling more now than in the whole time Logan had known him. "So cute you have people make sudden life changing decisions. You are going to do so many great things when you grow up. Because you're mine and Patton's kid, with his heart and my brains you're going to be an unstoppable force to be reckoned with. Anyone who tells you differently has me to deal with and they won't come out of that conversation with two fully functional legs." Sierra looked up at her dad's smiling face and gave her best attempt at copying him. "Do- do you see that? She's smiling- Patton she's smiling for me!! Get the camera while she's still doing it!"


	7. A New Venture

Roman was finding new ways to mention the word "baby" in a sentence every day. He knew Logan still needed time to think but it couldn't hurt to nudge him a little now and then. Him and Elisa were out shopping discussing it all.  
"I mean it would be kind of weird, if I was around your kid would they know I was their biological mom I just gave them up?" Elisa asked.  
"When or whether we tell them is up to you, you get to decide that when- sorry, if you gave us custody."  
"I mean I don't want to raise them myself but I still care about their well being. And if I was giving them to someone I really trusted and knew would love them, well that would put my mind at ease a lot." She scanned through the rack of clothes, looking at a dress. She paused and looked down at herself. "In a couple of months I won't fit into this… I'm really going to enjoy this aren't I…" Roman smiled sympathetically. Making their rounds around the store, Roman caught a glimpse of the baby section and went over immediately. "Oh no, don't look at the baby clothes." Elisa sighed.  
"They're so tiny!" Roman was getting emotional in the middle of the department store holding a fluffy teddy bear onesie.  
"Logan is still allowed to say no, Roman! And if he does, you need to accept that and let the baby go to someone else, you can't get attached."  
"...I think it's too late."  
"Roman!"  
"I'm sorry! But I've already started picturing my future with me, Logan and this baby! I can't imagine it any other way, I know Logan hasn't said yes yet but I really think he will!"  
"You think or you hope?" Elisa said and Roman sighed putting the onesie back. She came over and put an arm around him.  
"I just.. really want this."  
"I know, Ro, I know. And even if it doesn't happen now I'm sure you'll get it one day." Roman nodded but looked back at the rack.  
"I really want to buy it?"  
"Roman I'm barely two months pregnant."  
"I know but how cute would they look in this, come on!" He held it up and Elisa groaned.  
"Fine but you can't get anything else until Logan agrees and you can't talk to me about baby stuff for the rest of the day."  
"Ugh. Fine." Roman agreed and they went to the checkout. The woman scanning it looked up at them with a knowing smile.  
"Are we expecting?" She asked.  
"Uh." Elisa smirked and glanced at Roman. He smiled and put his arm around her.  
"Yes, we are." He said and now the both of them were trying not to laugh. The cashier looked slightly confused.  
"Congratulations. Do we know the gender yet?"  
"Not yet but we're definitely going to do a gender reveal party and light either a pink or blue bomb in our backyard." Elisa said.  
"Oh yeah, and I'm hoping for a boy of course to instill all my toxic masculinity into. If he does a single thing I consider effeminate he's dead to me." Roman said finally breaking and they both burst out laughing.  
"That really cheered me up!" Elisa grinned while the cashier quietly put in her total for her to pay with her card.  
"Me too, we should pretend to be straight more often it's so fun."  
"But Roman, I am straight."  
"Oh yeah I forgot, my condolences by the way." They smiled at each other, got their bags and walked out the store arm in arm.

Later at home Roman was making dinner and Logan saw his shopping bags on the floor so he went to put them away. He saw inside one and pulled out the onesie.  
"Roman?" Logan went into the kitchen and Roman turned around.  
"Yes honey- oh no." Roman saw what Logan was holding up. He laughed nervously. "I can explain- I just saw it with Elisa today and I thought it would be cute to buy you know, just in case, but I didn't want to pressure you or anything! I was just going to put it away where you wouldn't see it but I forgot I'd even bought it-"  
"Roman. It's okay."  
"It is?" Logan put the onesie down and came over, taking Roman's hands.  
"There's no denying this is scary. And people might call us stupid and reckless for jumping into this so quickly. But the very best things in my life have come when you've shown me it's okay to be courageous and go after what you really want. I have been thinking about it and… we can do it. We can raise Elisa's baby together."  
"You… you mean it? Honestly, because you don't have to, I don't want to have you stuck with a child just because I wanted one and then you'll end up resenting me and hating me and then you'll leave me-"  
"Hey. That's not happening." Logan put a hand on Roman's face and let him take a few moments to slow his breathing. "Roman. I do want to do this. I may be scared but you've always been the person that makes me believe all things are possible. And I may not have expected it this soon but I've wanted to have kids with you for a long time- hold on." Logan got out the timeline from his pocket and Roman looked down at, handling it in awe.  
"Is this that list you told me about?"  
"Yes. Embarrassing, I know, I was just a lovestruck college kid when I wrote it."  
"It's amazing. You're amazing." Roman beamed and caught Logan in a kiss that he happily melted into.  
"I love you Roman. I know we can do this together." Logan lingered, pressing their foreheads together.  
"I love you so much Logan.." Roman took another kiss before he could allow them to separate. He looked down at the paper still smiling. "This is incredible.. baby names!?"  
"You- we don't have to use those.."  
"Rose?" Roman looked up at him softly.  
"Well, yeah I thought there's been a lot of roses while we've been together. I was sweeping up the leftover leaves and stems of the performance roses when you came and found me backstage and a rose was the flower you gave to me on our first official date.. plus it's a nice name I think."  
"It's a beautiful name. Maybe if the baby is a girl…?"  
"We'll see, Roman. We'll see. Elisa is only about six weeks pregnant right now. At 12 weeks she'll have her first scan, usually known as a dating scan which is only used for estimating the due date, checking the baby's development and seeing if there is possibly more than one baby. Then at 18 to 21 weeks there will be an ultrasound scan and that can tell you the sex of the baby if you ask the doctor but sometimes the baby is in an awkward position and the doctor can't tell with 100% accuracy." Logan said and saw Roman was smirking. "What?"  
"Someone's been researching…"  
"Of course I have, it's one of the biggest decisions of my life, stop laughing at me."  
"I can't help if you're cute when you infodump." Roman wrapped his arms around him and pecked him on the cheek. Logan was tired and flustered and happy all at once.  
"Can't we just eat dinner now?"  
"Sure and you're telling me everything you've been looking up. Is there a binder ooh I bet there's a binder!!" Roman beamed.  
"There are.. four binders."  
"Oh you sweet, sweet nerd! What are they?"  
"One for pregnancy related things and how we can best support Elisa. One for adoption information, one for information about caring for a baby. And one for our wedding."  
"Oh… is it, bad that I'd almost forgot we were having one?"  
"I'd almost forgotten myself, this baby stuff has been taking up a lot of my mind. We could always elope? City hall, get it done one less thing to worry about?"  
"Yeah, I guess we could.." Roman said but Logan saw through it.  
"But you want a big wedding."  
"I don't need a big wedding! I just have always dreamed of having one, it doesn't have to be big.."  
"Well you know that once the baby comes we will have absolutely no time to have one, they're a full time commitment and I think if we left it until after they we were born we might not get around to it for at least a couple years."  
"I don't want to wait that long to be married to you."  
"Me either. So… looks like in the span of about.. 7 months we have to plan a wedding, and get ready for having a baby." Logan said and Roman nodded.  
"We're going to need more binders.."


	8. Uncle Virge

Virgil Storm looked down at his phone and smirked a little at the name on his screen. He pressed accept and held it to his ear.  
“What’s up snake boy?”  
“Oh ha ha, I love that nickname.” Virgil imagined Janus rolling his eyes which he surely was. “Look I have a favour to ask you if you’re not busy.”  
“I just got out of work and I don’t have plans so what’s up?”  
“Is there any chance you could babysit tonight?”  
“You mean like… all by myself?”  
“Me and Patton haven’t had a break since Sierra came home, we’re exhausted. Patton more than me, he never stops worrying about her. We need some serious couple time and these new friends of ours invited us to dinner.”  
“Oh so you’ve got new friends have you? Forgotten all about me then.”  
“Don’t be jealous Virgil, it’s Patton who wants to get to know them more. I just want one night where I can see him enjoy himself without thinking about the kids. Please Virge. You know Micah loves you.”  
“Yeah I know I just don’t know if I can take care of the baby all night, I don’t trust myself- what if something goes wrong?”  
“Well Patton and I trust you. In fact you’re the only person I would trust to watch them all night. If there’s any problem you can call us and we’ll come back, their apartment isn’t far away.”  
“Okay I guess.”  
“Thank you Virgil.” Janus said. “Can we see you here at 5?”

Virgil showed up at their door at 5, incredibly nervous but trying not to show it. Patton and Janus needed him to show that he was responsible enough to watch their kids. He clenched his palms until the door was opened for him by Patton.  
"Hey Virgil, good to see you!" Patton smiled and put his arms around him in a warm hug. Virgil smiled, this was the only person he'd accept a hug from so easily. He’ll admit when he first met Janus’s boyfriend he was suspicious and slightly protective. He may constantly make fun of Janus and call him names but that was their love language. Janus had been there for him growing up, the one person he could count on so whoever dated him had to be worthy. Luckily Patton won over Virgil easily and now when Virgil teases Janus that he loves Patton more he’s only half kidding.  
"Hey Pat."  
"Come inside!" Patton let him in. Virgil made his way in where the family home had all the clutter and mess two small kids are bound to make. In the kitchen Micah was at the table eating alphabet soup for dinner but he got up and ran over to Virgil as soon as he saw him.  
"Hey buddy." Virgil smiled and picked him up.  
"Hey Uncle Virge!" Micah hugged him, excitement level through the roof.  
"He's been asking us every ten seconds when you would get here since the moment we said you were babysitting." Janus said. He was holding Sierra, gently rocking her.  
"We're gonna have so much fun!" Micah said.  
"Can you finish your dinner first sweetie, then you and Virgil can have lots of fun before bedtime." Patton said and Micah went back to his place at the table. "Okay Virge, I'm going to make Sierra's bottle now and with any luck after she'll get sleepy and you can put her right to bed. Hopefully she'll be asleep almost the whole time you're here. But if you have any problems at all you can call us okay?"  
"Yeah, got it." Virgil nodded.  
"But just in case, I wrote down Roman and Logan's phone number if you couldn't reach us and everything you might need if she woke up is in this bag here. And you know how to change her right if you need to? Am I forgetting anything.. if she really can't sleep sometimes we put on ocean sounds for her or you can just sit with her with the tv quiet in the background as white noise and that usually helps."  
"Patton it's okay, I can take care of her for one night." Virgil was starting to see what Janus had meant. Patton looked slightly anxious and sleep deprived, nervous to leave his baby behind. He needed a break and so Virgil would be confident with his babysitting abilities for his sake.  
"I know, I do trust you." Patton took a breath. "This is the first time I'm going to be leaving her with someone that isn't Janus but I trust you as much as anyone else in the family."  
"You really think I'm one of the family?" Virgil looked between him and Janus. Janus smirked.  
"Micah doesn't call you Uncle Virge for nothing dummy."

Virgil was finally able to usher the couple out the door after hearing a lot more instructions from Patton detailing every possible situation and what to do with it. Eventually Virgil was able to settle in the living room to feed Sierra. She took to the bottle eagerly and didn't seem to mind it wasn't one of her dads feeding her. Virgil wondered if she recognised him as that guy who comes around a lot to hang out with her parents.  
"Look Micah I think she's falling asleep.." Virgil said quietly. Sure enough as she drank the last drops of her bottle her eyelids got heavy and she began to open and close them sleepily. Micah stroked the fluff of baby hair on her head.  
"Night, night Sierra." He said. Virgil made an effort to move as quietly and smoothly as possible as he stood up and took Sierra into her bedroom. He lay her down in her crib and watched as she lay there, calmly dozing. Virgil listened very carefully and listened to her breaths. It relaxed him every time he heard her inhale and exhale. He hadn't known how to feel at first about all this kid stuff. When Patton and Janus said they wanted to foster he couldn't understand why they'd give up their lives to have everything consumed by the stress of taking care of and being responsible for a tiny human being. He thought they'd be too busy to ever talk to him again. Then Micah came along and man was he the most likeable kid you ever saw. Virgil felt protective over him, especially after thinking about what his childhood could've been like if Patton and Janus hadn't rescued him. Virgil never had the chance to be given away to a better home like that. His parents were.. plain bad and he doesn't like talking or even thinking about them. He saw himself in young Micah and would personally make sure he knew he was loved and important. When they gained custody of Sierra too it was one of the best days ever. Virgil couldn't remember feeling so happy.  
Virgil left Sierra to sleep and started getting Micah ready for bed. They had bath time and picked out some Star Wars pajamas. Virgil helped him brush his teeth and then they decided to do some colouring. Micah let his scribbling go wild over the page. And Virgil watched him.  
"Do you like it?" Micah asked.  
"I love it, it's a masterpiece."  
"Can you draw me something?"  
"Sure, like what?"  
"A dog? They're my favourite animal."  
"Oh yeah?" Virgil took a crayon from the box and started drawing. "Dogs are cool."  
"Daddy said that maybe- when Sierra's older we could get a dog. Just not yet cause she's still a baby."  
"Yeah, dogs need a lot of love and care."  
"I'll take care of it! I'll feed it and play with it every day!"  
"Will you pick up it's poop too?"  
"... maybe dad can do that bit." Micah said and Virgil chuckled.  
"There, there's my attempt." Virgil showed his little drawing of dog with floppy ears and red collar.  
"Doggy!" Micah smiled. He got a brown crayon and did his best to colour it without messing it up, sticking his tongue out as he concentrated.  
Soon enough it was bedtime and Virgil tucked Micah in under his space themed bed sheets. Virgil looked through Micah's bookshelf and found a picture book to read him. Virgil did his best to put some variety in his usually deadpan voice and do voices that would make the kid laugh. Just seeing Micah smile meant he was doing something right.  
"The end. All right shooting star, I think it's time for you to sleep now."  
"Not yet! Can't you sing me a song like daddy does?" Micah looked up at him with the widest pleading eyes. Virgil physically couldn't say no.  
"Okay. But I don't know many lullabies…"  
"That's okay!" Micah settled down ready to listen. Virgil thought for a moment and took a breath preparing himself.  
"I sense there's something in the wind, that feels like tragedy's hand. And though I'd like to stand by him, can't shake this feeling that I have." Virgil sang softly, the melody and lyrics of "Sally's song" being the closest thing to a lullaby he knew. It was working and Micah listened, looking sleepier by the second. By the third voice his eyes were closed but Virgil carried on as he pulled the covers up and tucked him in. "What will become of my dear friend? Where will his actions lead us then? Although I'd like to join the crowd, In their enthusiastic cloud. Try as I may it doesn't last. And will we ever.. end up together..?" Virgil got up and began to creep to the door. "No I think not. It's never to become, for I am not the one.." He began pulling the door closed when he heard Micah's small voice whisper.  
"I love you Uncle Virge." Virgil paused for a good second, processing the joy it gave to his heart.  
"I love you too Micah." He said before shutting the door. Once it was closed he was smiling to himself, overcome with an emotion he has never had nearly enough of. Pure unconditional love. This kid… he was suddenly so grateful his friends had made the decision to become parents. And once they came back he was going to demand they go out more often so he could babysit more.


	9. Double Trouble

When Elisa was 18, she had a suitcase, a duffel bag and a backpack containing everything she cared about, all her most important possessions. She hauled them all down the stairs while her mother was still yelling. Elisa wouldn't have to listen for much longer.  
"You won't get any more help for us and I mean it! You walk out that door and we will never speak to you again!"  
"I'm planning on it." Elisa sighed, opening the front door.  
"You'll regret it. You'll burn out, you'll run out of money and come crawling to me and your father and you won't get any."  
"Maybe! But I can fight my own battles, I don't need you! And when I need help I talk to my friends, I can't remember the last time I had an honest conversation with you because you don't take my problems seriously!"  
"Problems. You had your life ahead of you and you through it away. All those savings for your college education, you had your place at Harvard! Thousands of people would kill for the chances you had and yet you're going to do what? Be a dancer? It's not a real career. You were supposed to be a lawyer, we've worked so hard to get you every opportunity so you could succeed."  
"First of all, the money in that savings account is supposed to be mine whether I choose to go to college or not but I'm done arguing about that. I'm not going to waste my life being miserable in a job I hate just to please you. Pleasing you is impossible. I'm going to be a dancer mama. It's what I love to do, what I was born to do. I'm sorry it has to be this way but if you can't just support who I am then I can't be around you anymore."  
"Elisa. Elisa!" Her mother watched as she marched out to her car and put her things in the trunk. "Jorge!" She called to her husband who hadn't wanted to watch this final fight. To Elisa's surprise he came out to the car and helped her as she was struggling to close the trunk.  
"Papa.. I'm sorry." She said quietly, starting to feel the guilt now. He shook his head.  
"She's just too angry to see clearly. I'll see about getting you access to the saving account"  
"You don't have to." She looked up at him. He'd never been one to easily give affection but he gave her a quick one armed hug.  
"Call us when you're settled. She does care about you no matter what she says."  
"Maybe.." Elisa looked back at her mom who looked an all new colour of anger and disappointment. She left the doorway and went back inside. Elisa said goodbye to her dad and got in the car, driving off. It wasn't until she spent her first night in her new apartment in the city that she actually cried about it. She felt so alone, like she had no family at all.

Roman was her family. And now she was giving a baby to him… what if she lost him? What if it became too weird for her to be around the baby and they couldn't hang out anymore. Elisa couldn't imagine a life without Roman.. it was impossible. Who would hold her when she cried and know the exact right song to play when they drove around together? Who knew all their years of inside jokes and choreographed dances and memories? But she saw how happy he was about this baby. Even Logan seemed to getting more into the idea every day and seemed to be the only thing they talked about anymore. It was starting to get annoying.  
"I swear I can see a bump, look El you're starting to show!" Roman marvelled at Elisa's belly which to be fair had started to grow in the past few weeks.  
"Oh goody." Elisa grumbled before looking down and rubbing self consciously. "Can't I have your baby without my body changing at all?" Roman and Logan were sitting either side of her in the clinic's waiting room. Logan was filling in all the necessary forms for her.  
"You don't have an emergency contact listed." Logan said.  
"Roman, duh." She said.  
"Really! I'm honoured!" Roman grinned.  
"Who else?" She smiled a little back at him. Although the nerves were still churning inside her. A nurse came out to the waiting room and all three of them looked up, sitting upright expectantly.  
"Sara Peterson?" She asked and they leaned back again. Not them. Elisa looked over as a woman much further along than her got up with her husband. They smiled at each other before following the nurse into one of the doctor's rooms. They were happy, they'd probably been trying for a long time and now were so excited to have a baby together. Elisa's nerves intensified.  
"Distract me please." She said and Roman looked at her, knowing how she felt in an instant.  
"Oh okay- well- oh! I wasn't going to say anything but do you want me to tell you the gift I got you for agreeing to give us your baby?"  
"Roman you don't have to get me anything… what is it?" Elisa perked up a little.  
"Well soon enough you might not be able to get around as much so I'm giving you one weekend jam packed full of fun before you get fully pregnant."  
"Where? Where?"  
"How would you like a trip to New York City?"  
"Oh cool!" Elisa grinned. "I haven't been since I was a kid! Can Remus come?"  
"Yep, we're all going. Me, you Rem and Logan. It's gonna be so fun! Plus I'm working on getting us broadway tickets."  
"What show??"  
"I wanted you to help me pick!"  
"Ro you really shouldn't have. I'm doing this for the good for it not for anything in return.." Elisa said but she couldn't help a smile creeping onto her face. "But what the hell, pregnancy sucks and I deserve it. NYC baby!"  
"We still have to be careful, you can't do the same crazy stuff you'd usually do on trips like this." Logan said.  
"Okay fine mom, we'll be good." Elisa grinned. The nurse came out again and 9nce again they all looked up at her.  
"Elisa Lopez?" She said and Elisa nodded and got up with Roman and Logan closely following behind. Elisa saw Roman squeeze Logan's hand and knew she wasn't the only nervous one. Logan had a head full of information pertaining to babies and pregnancy and all they could possibly expect. Including everything that could possibly go wrong. It was overwhelming and now all he wanted was some confirmation that the baby was doing well. Healthy and safe and developing.  
Soon Elisa was lying back in the chair waiting for the doctor, Roman was sitting by her side and Logan was pacing around the room.  
"Lo you did say yourself this first scan won't tell us much. Even if there was something wrong- which I'm sure there isn't, relax. It's still early." Roman said, wishing he would just relax for a second. But for Logan, impossible.  
"I know I'm just- anxious to hear that everything's as it should be."  
"Honestly me too, this baby is mine to keep happy and healthy and damn it I will do a good job for you guys." Elisa said which did manage to make Logan stop pacing and smile a little.  
"I know. I'm sure you will, I trust you." He said. The door opened and the doctor came in.  
"Hello, Lopez family?" She said looking down at the forms.  
"Yes- no?" Elisa chuckled. "It's a long story but basically I'm giving this kid away to these lovely gentlemen here. So if you could refrain from calling it my baby or using language in the future tense that implies I will be a parent to this baby. Because I'm carrying it but it's not mine it's theirs."  
"Understood." The doctor nodded with a friendly smile. "We've had similar cases before so it's no trouble. I'm Dr Kimathi, it's nice to meet you Elisa. And you two are?"  
"I'm Roman," Roman said and looked over at Logan who looked more relaxed now there was a professional present.  
"And I'm Logan and I really would like to have my mind put to rest that the baby's doing well so please do your thing."  
"I'll get right to it then." Dr Kimathi pulled up a chair and put on some gloves. "Did you drink water before coming without going to the bathroom?"  
"Yeah, and I can't wait to go once this is over."  
"It shouldn't take much longer than 15 minutes. Having a full bladder can make the picture show up easier that's all. Can you lift up your shirt for me please?" Elisa did so and the doctor put some gel on her stomach before putting on the handheld device attached to the scanner to have a look inside. Roman and Logan watched the grainy black and grey image on the screen move around and although they didn't know exactly what they were seeing, the doctor's smile seemed like a good sign.  
"There they are." She said pointing to the screen. "Still quite small at this stage."  
"About the size of a lime." Logan added.  
"Yes, very good." The doctor was still making checks on the equipment while Roman took Logan's hand as they watched the wavering grey blob together.  
"It's the most beautiful lime I've ever seen.." Roman looked from it to Logan. Nervous Logan seemed to have faded away, here was happy and excited Logan getting the first glimpse of their child. "Lo, this is really happening isn't it."  
"I'm afraid so. And I'm not letting you back out of your own idea now, I love that little lime sized baby and when it's born we're taking it home and raising it together alright?"  
"Backing out? I'm more sure than ever this is what I want to do." Roman smiled at him and leaned his head against his arm.  
"You guys are being too cute, I might have to barf." Elisa said, watching them watch the screen. Forget body changes, morning sickness and mood swings, when she saw them looking so happy she knew why she was doing this. The moment was disrupted by the doctor starting to move the scanner around like she was double checking something. Frowning at the screen slightly.  
"Is something wrong?" Logan asked, nerves starting to rise again. His mind jumped to the worst.  
"Not wrong exactly." The doctor did a few more checks before looking at them. "It seems like there are two babies."  
"...Two?" Logan looked from the Doctor to Roman.  
"Twins." The doctor confirmed. Logan and Roman stared at her. Neither knowing how to respond. Elisa waved a hand in front of them.  
"Hello? Guys?" Roman came around first.  
"Wow, twins.. we weren't expecting it but.. wow."  
"How- um.. what-" Logan was still struggling to form words, Roman patted his arm.  
"Take your time honey."  
"Roman? Can I talk with you alone?" Logan left the room and Roman hurried to follow him.  
"What are we going to do?" Logan said a hushed panic when they were out in the hall.  
"What do you mean Lo? Sure we weren't expecting two but it's not that much different than one."  
"It's very different! We could just about afford it before but now every cost I estimated the other night is doubled- and we'll have to move sooner, we could maybe stay in that apartment for a couple years with one baby but two-"  
"Logan, take a breath." Roman held his hands and breathed with him. "All of this we can figure out. But these are our kids now, you're not regretting that part are you?"  
"No. I just- feel responsible now, it's all hitting me. I want to give them the best life possible."  
"And we will! I know we can. And it's not your responsibility, it's ours. We're in this together Lo, we're going to be dads."  
"Dads.." Logan smiled. "We're really going to be dads?"  
"To twins Logan. Can you believe it?" Roman smiled and embraced him. They held onto each other before Logan pulled away feeling far more at ease. He held onto Roman's hand. "Ready to go back in there?"  
"I am." Logan nodded. They went back in together, back to Elisa and the children she was carrying that would soon be their family.


	10. Single Friends

Of the four of them, Patton and Roman had started spending the most time together. Roman would take any excuse to come over and help take care of Micah and Sierra and Patton was never going to refuse help. Plus they got along so well. Roman loved his practical fiance, and his cynical best friend and his chaotic brother but it was nice to be friends with someone who got excited about the same things he did. They baked cakes together and had marathons of disney movies. One night Patton invited Virgil over and he came, as much as he didn't like feeling like a third wheel with Patton and his new friend. Patton led him into the family room where Roman was already. He was playing with Sierra who was lying on her tummy on the play mat. She could sometimes hold her head up now.  
"Roman this is my and Janus's best friend, Virgil." Patton introduced. Virgil was happy about being given the best friend title and he could guess Patton through that in there to make him feel better.  
"Hi." Virgil said and sat down. Roman smiled at him.  
"Hey Virgil, I'm Roman. Patton told me you're a disney fan too?"  
"Sort of. I like ruining them for people who think they're all about goodness and happy endings."  
"What do you mean?" Roman said and Virgil clocked him for a dreamy hopeless romantic type right away.  
"Oh, this is going to be fun."  
One heated debate later Patton was feeding Sierra and watching the back and forth banter go on.  
"Okay- Sleeping Beauty!" Roman said, getting more frustrated while Virgil was leaning back in his chair.  
"Now we’re back to the lack of consent with sleeping women.”  
“It was to lift a curse!!” Roman’s annoyance was only making Virgil more amused. Virgil was ruining every disney movie one by one.  
"What about the little mermaid?" Patton suggested.  
"Don't sign a sea witch's contract until you have your mer-lawyer look over it first." Virgil said.  
"Or learn to write, or use sign language, there's more than one way to tell the prince you're the girl that saved him." Roman mumbled.  
"Wait did I hear a hint of sarcasm towards a disney movie?" Patton chuckled.  
"Okay fine, Jack Smellington here has a couple points but Disney isn't all dark subliminal messages."  
"I know, I was just pointing them out. I like those movies just as much as you." Virgil smirked.  
"Uncle Virge?" Micah had appeared at the door. "I didn't know you were here!"  
"Hey Micah, how come you got out of bed?" Patton asked.  
"I had a bad dream." Micah said. Virgil came over and picked him up.  
"I'll take care of it Pat. Now tell me about this dream shooting star." Virgil carried him off back to bed. Patton looked back at Roman.  
"Sorry about him, he tends to argue the opposite of whatever someone's talking about."  
"I like him." Roman smiled. "Do you think he likes me?"  
"Oh definitely. Or he wouldn't have so much fun making fun of you."  
"Have you been friends with him for a long time."  
"About as long as I've known Janus." Pattok smiled as he reminisced. "He's been a part of the family from the beginning. I sometimes worry about him though. It hasn't been the same since we got married, I think he feels left out."  
"Hm.. is he single?" Roman wondered.  
"Roman! I don't think I should tell Logan you said that!" Patton joked.  
"No- oh not for me obviously!" Roman shook his head. "It's just.. I feel the same way about my brother Remus. We've been spending way less time together since I moved in with Logan. I think he's lonely though he doesn't like to admit he has any bad feelings. He's gone from person to person, never finding a connection with anyone like me and Logan have. I sometimes get the sense he's jealous. Not of us specifically, just.. of having that with someone?"  
"Virgil hasn't been on a date in ages. He never makes any effort to meet anyone because he finds the whole process so nerve wracking."  
"Maybe we could.. help them both?" Roman suggested. "Are you thinking what I'm thinking?"  
"Setting them up, I see."  
"Virgil is exactly Remus's type. He's edgy, introverted, an emo type, he has a no nonsense attitude that my brother really needs for reining in his antics. And Remus could help Virgil be more confident! And Remus has no filter, if you're in a relationship with him you do not have to worry guessing how he feels. He'll tell you."  
"I think that's exactly what Virgil needs." Patton smiled. "How could we get them to meet?"  
"Uh, a party! We could have a party at my place! An engagement party in fact, I've always wanted one of those."  
"Yay!"  
"You're in charge of inviting Virgil and making sure he comes and I'll find a way to make sure he meets Remus."  
"It's going to be hard. Virgil usually avoids parties at all costs."  
"We'll have to find a way. Love is in the air! And once Virgil and Remus start dating the whole group will be connected and no one will feel left out. Except maybe Elisa but she doesn't need or want to date for a long, long time."  
"What are we talking about?" Virgil came back in the room and Roman and Patton tried to act normal, ending up looking very unnormal and suspicious.  
"My friend Elisa.. I'm having twins you know." Roman said.  
"Patton told me you were having a baby. I just didn't know it was twins."  
"We found out two weeks ago. My life is crazy right now."  
"You two are the crazy ones." Virgil curled back up in his chair. "Having babies, getting married. It's so grown up. Couldn't be me."  
"What about love? If the right person came along do you think you'd be ready?"  
"I don't know…" Virgil fiddled with his jacket nervously. "It depends.. Does the right person like horror movies?"  
"He loves them." Roman said.  
"He couldn't be allergic to cats because I have one."  
"Let's say he isn't and in fact he loves cats."  
"Hm well… maybe.." Virgil looked between Roman and Patton who were smiling mischievously. "What? What are you guys planning?"  
"Oh you will see Gerard Gay. You will see."


	11. Invitations and Celebrations

The future was vast and uncertain, Logan had too much on his mind all at once. Focusing all his organisational skills on one party might be what he needed. Roman came into the apartment seeing Logan putting invitations into envelopes. Roman sat down beside him and picked one up.  
"You are invited to join Logan and Roman as they celebrate their engagement." Roman read out. He kissed Logan on the cheek and the invitation machine snapped out of his methodical rhythm.  
"When did you get here?" Logan asked, looking down at the coffee table as if noticing the mess for the first time. The binders were spread out on the floor, paper and stationary abound. The whole living room was the chaos of Logan's mind in physical form. "Sorry I've been- doing this all afternoon. I don't think I can feel my thumbs anymore but that doesn't matter."  
"Take a break party planner." Roman took an invitation out of Logan's overworked hand and set it down gently.  
"I have to send them out tonight Ro! We have to give people enough notice!"  
"I'll do them. I order you to stop worrying about the party and leave the rest to me." Roman said. Logan folded his arms leaning back on the sofa, mumbling under his breath. "Sorry what was that?" Roman started leaning closer and Logan was already fighting back a smile. "Are you talking to me?"  
"Roman. Please don't."  
"You mad? Do you want to start a fight right now?" Roman kept on leaning over him with a grin. Logan rolled his eyes, the smile creeping onto his face. "Because we can fight if that's what you want."  
"Please not again-" But it was too late. Roman got his hands on Logan's waist and started tickling him. Logan was trying to wiggle out of his grip while laughing the most adorable, genuine laugh that only Roman could bring about. "Stop- Ro-" Logan laughed and Roman only persisted, moving on top of him to pin him down. Roman held Logan's wrists down and showered him with kisses all over his face while he giggled and stopped squirming so much. Logan managed to stop laughing and looked up at Roman, knowing he was a blushing mess right now. "You're impossible." Logan sighed.  
"You're cute." Roman pecked another kiss on his nose. "And incredible and handsome and smart and strong and did I mention so darn cute?"  
"Stop it..." Logan whined.  
"Never. Face it you're stuck with me. This proves it baby." Roman held up his engagement ring triumphantly. "Til death do us part. You have to put up with my compliments and embarrassing romantic speeches and constant affection forever and ever."  
"And I wouldn't have it any other way." Logan said softly. With a hand free he reached up to do one of his favourite things in the world. Play with Roman's hair. He watched Roman instantly relax and lean into the touch. Logan pulled Roman down for a real kiss and he wasn't going to resist at all. The pair were easily distracted in make out sessions. More so when they were younger and any time they could get alone would be 'lock the door and kiss me now' time. But even now, Logan kissed Roman, feeling his body against his, being held in his strong, safe arms and felt all the butterflies of the teenager sneaking around. Logan realised this was a much more effective distraction. "Mm, wait." Logan pulled away a little. "... those invites really do have to be sent out tonight or at a stretch tomorrow morning." Roman nodded and lifted himself up, the two untangling themselves from one another and straightening their clothes.  
"Don't you worry, your prince is to the rescue." Roman started continuing what Logan started. Logan watched him neatly stack the envelopes in Logan's signature filing method. He'd explained it to Roman ages ago in a ramble he hadn't believed he'd been listening to. If it was possible, Logan just fell for this man even harder. He got up and went around to the back of the couch, hovering near Roman.  
"When you're finished you could come into the bedroom and... "fight" me some more." Logan suggested. Roman froze, looking up from the envelopes. "... by fight I mean, that's what you've just started calling sex for some reason-"  
"I know Lo, you don't have to explain the metaphor." Roman smirked.  
"Well, you know where to find me for round two." Logan went off to the bedroom and Roman was the one left blushing now.  
"He's getting good at this.." he said to himself. He looked down at the envelopes and started speeding up the work, sealing them as fast as he could. "Who opens real mail anyway? Why can't we send them an email- or a facebook invite-" But Roman knew that it was a nice personal touch to send to their friends and family. He kept going and did it properly, for Logan. When he got to the last envelope he frowned. It didn't have an address on it. Must be a spare, he thought. He was about to get up when he hesitated. He stared at the blank address and thought about the people he tried to never let himself think about. The people everyone most wants to come to their wedding and baby shower and even engagement party. The people who should be there at these life changing events, no matter what. Roman got a pen and quickly wrote down the address, put the invite inside and slipped it into the pile before he could change his mind. He got up and practically ran into the bedroom, tackling Logan who was sitting on the edge of the bed waiting for him. The two of them soon engaged in more giggles and shameless flirting.

Later, Roman had his head against Logan's bare chest. He listened to his heartbeat, steady and relaxed. Logan's fingers had been gently stroking Roman's arm but now Roman felt his movements slow. Roman peeked up at him. Logan's eyes were starting to flutter close.  
"Logan?" Roman whispered and Logan blinked a little.  
"Yes- mhm, what?"  
"My parents… what if they've changed since I last spoke to them.. what if it's time I started trying to fix our relationship."  
"Well, people can change… but-"  
"But what?" Roman felt Logan's chest rise and fall in a sigh. Logan closed his eyes and started stroking Roman's arm again.  
"Considering how you left things, they should be the ones reaching out to you. You did nothing wrong and they cut you off. You gave them chance after chance even after Remus gave up. You shouldn't be the one letting them in to hurt you again when they haven't shown any sign of wanting to make things right with you. They've had plenty of opportunity to do so."  
"I know I just.. I want my family to be at my wedding. I want parents who will want to do the normal parent stuff with me. Giving me unwanted marriage advice, walking me down the aisle… they don't even know they're going to be grandparents yet. Though they might not want to be. I just feel like I have nothing to lose, you know? If they start showing up and supporting me, great, if not I still have the best family in the world."  
"And it's their loss if they miss the chance of joining it." Logan said, kissing the top of Roman's head. "But be careful alright? Don't ever let them make you feel inferior. I'll always be here to protect you."  
"I love you." Roman relaxed into Logan's arms, the weight lifted off his mind.  
"I love you too." Logan let his eyes close to drift off into sweet, worriless sleep. 

At 17, Roman had a habit of throwing rocks at Logan's window. Logan would come over and open it and watch the wannabe rebel climb the neighbor's tree and use a particular branch to shuffle over to the window. Logan reached out and helped him inside.  
"We really are a teenage romance cliche now aren't we?" Logan teased. But this one time Roman looked different than all the times he just wanted to sneak in to spend the night in Logan's bed. He had a full backpack and his eyes were red with tear stains.  
"I told them…" Roman said quietly, his voice broken from crying. Logan's face fell in concern and he opened up his arms. Roman hugged him tightly, starting to cry again into Logan's chest. Logan stroked Roman's hair and held him comfortingly, eventually managing to move them to the bed and lying Roman down.  
"Take your time Roman, you're safe here and you don't have to go back there." Logan was kneeling down, a gentle hand touching Roman's face. Roman's breathing slowed and he started to calm down, grounding himself by looking deep into Logan's eyes.  
"I'm- sorry-"  
"You never have to apologise for this."  
"But- won't your folks be mad.."  
"Let me handle them, they'll understand once I explain."  
"It was worse than I ever imagined." Roman said quietly. "They really don't want me to be their son anymore. They said if I refuse to change- which I couldn't even if I wanted to, this is who I am- then I'm no longer a part of their family."  
"Oh Roman, I'm so sorry. You don't deserve this." Logan said. He got onto the bed and Roman moved into his arms as Logan held and soothed him. "They're the ones missing out. They were lucky to be gifted with a son like you, with such a brave and loving heart. I'm so proud of you for coming out but as I said before, sometimes it isn't the best thing when your family is homophobic."  
"I know- but they were already starting to see through the act and I couldn't hold it in any longer-"  
"I know, it's okay.." Logan said softly. "Whatever happens, you have Remus, you have Elisa. And you have me. I'll always protect you." Roman sniffled and started to smile a little.  
"One of these days I have to protect you from something."  
"Roman, you've already saved me from living a boring, meaningless, loveless life. I'll never be able to fully pay you back for that."  
"Okay sure. But if you ever get mugged or kidnapped or locked in a tower with an evil dragon- um.. witch guarding it-"  
"A dragon witch?"  
"It's a thing I just made up! Then you can call me. I am your prince after all."  
"That you are, my hero."


	12. The Thomas-Sanders Family Reunion

Patton, Janus and Virgil walked into the venue together, Virgil less than enthused at being forced to attend a social gathering. But Patton had convinced him that he should support his new friend Roman. And he’d bribed him with cookies and more Micah time.  
“You have to promise not to leave me alone, I don’t know anyone except you two.” Virgil said, standing close to Patton.  
“You know Roman! And we should introduce you to Logan! He’s really fun too!” Patton said, starting to look around for them.  
“Patton are you sure your mom knows what she’s doing with the kids?” Janus asked.  
“She’ll be fine, she raised me all by herself!"  
"... I'm just going to call her. Just to check in."  
"We only left her 20 minutes ago!" Patton said but Janus was already putting the phone to his ear.  
"Hi, Charlotte?" He walked off into the hall to take the call. Patton shook his head a little and took Virgil's arm.  
"Shall we go look for Roman?" He said. Virgil shrugged and let Patton lead him around the party.  
Logan was standing next to Roman when he suddenly nudged him to get his attention.  
"They're here. Brace yourself." Logan was nodding in the direction of the door where his parents were just entering. Logan sometimes wonders if there was a chance there was a mix up at the hospital because he has inherited almost none of his parents' bohemian, free spirited, upbeat nature. Growing up he was the realist who only believed in scientifically proven fact living with a couple of hippies who strongly believed in auras, chakras, and the energy flow of the universe. Roman loved them.  
"Lolo, look at you!" His mother came over and kissed him on both cheeks. "My baby boy is getting married, I can't believe it!"  
"Hi mom." Logan said. "... what do you mean I can't believe it?"  
"Well we were always rooting for you two kids but we were getting impatient for you to pop the question." His dad came and hugged him tightly. "When you've met your soulmate you just know, that's what happened with me and your mom. As soon as I saw her I knew I was going to marry that woman."  
"Dad, I don't believe in soulmates. I believe I fell in love and we've decided to spend our lives together. Technically we don't need to get married to do that, weddings are a socially constructed custom originally used by the patriarchy to control women but-"  
"Dustin! Barbara! So glad you could make it!" Roman was now hugging each of them and they were even more excited to see him.  
"Roman, I'm so glad you and Logan have found each other. It really feels meant to be." Barbara gushed.  
"It does doesn't it?" Roman smiled. "We're really happy. And Dustin I don't actually think we should've gotten engaged any sooner. Everything's going really good for us and I think he timed his proposal perfectly."  
"And we're so happy you're both happy!" Dustin grinned, putting a hand on Roman's shoulder. "There's no one I'd rather have as my son in law. It brings me so much joy to see how happy you make our Lolo. Welcome to the family, son."  
"Thank you so much. You don't know what that means to hear." Roman beamed, glancing at Logan who was smiling too.  
"Now we'll get out of your hair, we'll go and mingle for a while. Darling look, champagne!" Dustin put an arm around his wife and they wandered off together.  
"I love them." Roman said. "You know I'm only marrying you so I can be a Thomas too."  
"Of course." Logan said. "And they're overjoyed to have you join the chaos that is my family. Hey… are you really going to change your last name?"  
"We haven't talked about this yet but I think we should hyphenate. You know like, Sanders-Thomas."  
"What about Thomas-Sanders?"  
"Oh yeah, that sounds way better… Mr and Mr Thomas-Sanders, huh I like it! Wait, are you just trying to get your last name first?"  
"I don't know what to tell you Roman, it just fits better." Logan smirked, taking a victory sip of champagne.  
"Have you told them about the babies yet?" Roman asked and Logan shook his head.  
"Not yet. Although their reaction will certainly be over the top and they can't keep a secret so soon everyone here will know and it will turn from an engagement party to congratulating us on the twins. And I'm sure Elisa doesn't want all that attention on her right now."  
"So after the party then?"  
"That would be best, yeah." Logan nodded. Roman looked around and saw Patton and Virgil.  
"Oh good they're here! Where's Remus?"  
"I have no idea, why?"  
"Me and Patton are going to use this opportunity to get him and Virgil to meet and then we'll set them up and they'll start dating and then we'll all be friends and we'll all be in couples and it'll be amazing! Everyone will be happy!"  
"Roman, you have to stop trying to play matchmaker. It never ends well. People should be allowed to form relationships naturally without your meddling."  
"It will form naturally as soon as I push them in the right direction! Towards each other!" Roman went off to find Remus and Logan sighed watching him go. By now he had learned you could not stop Roman when he had an idea like this. Logan glanced over to check on his parents and saw his mom talking to Elisa. He quickly went over to the two of them. Elisa was laughing at something Barbara said.  
"Lolo!?" She said to Logan as he approached. Logan blushed. "She was telling me the cutest story, go on Barb."  
"Lolo loved space when he was little, he wanted to be an astronaut when he grew up. He built a rocket with some help from his dad. It was wooden with four wheels and they took it to the top of the hill near our house. Little Lolo sat in it, put on his helmet and was ready to ride the cart down. His dad gave him a little push and he flew down so fast, making a bit of a crash landing in a bush at the bottom. We said 'was that fun?' And he said 'Mommy, I think I'm going to work at ground control instead, I don't want to go in a rocket anymore.'"  
"Aw, you sweet little baby!" Elisa pinched Logan's cheek and Logan folded his arms, huffing.  
"That cart was an unstable death trap. I don't know how dad could've let me get in it."  
"We never wanted to hold you back from your dreams. And you shouldn't let failure hold you back from getting up and trying again! Like for instance why didn't you study to work for NASA when that's what you really wanted to do your whole childhood?"  
"Children grow up mom, and dreams don't pay the bills. Teaching is going fine for me."  
"Fine isn't good enough! Fine doesn't let you experience the wonders of life! We only have one short time in this plane of existence and you have to follow your true passions before it's too late! Take your beautiful friend Elisa. I have always admired how she took charge of her destiny and pursued her love of dancing."  
"Why thank you Mrs Thomas, it had always felt like the right move for me." Elisa smiled.  
"Can I just say there is something very different about you, has something changed since the last time I saw you?" Barbara was looking Elisa over as if she could see into her soul.  
"I uh.. I'm using a new skin cream?"  
"No that's not it. But you are glowing, inside and out."  
"Mom, leave it alone." Logan said but he saw the look of realisation dawn on her face. It did freak him out a little when his mother just knew things she couldn't possibly know.  
"You're pregnant?" She whispered, starting to get excited already.  
"No, no she isn't." Logan tried to cover.  
"That's an absolute falsehood, Lolo. You are, aren't you?" She looked back to Elisa who shrugged and nodded.  
"Yup. I sure am."  
"Oh wow! Congratulations! May I?"  
"Sure but there's not much there." Elisa let Barbara put her hands on her slightly protruding baby bump.  
"It's twins isn't it." Barbara said.  
"How do you do these things!?" Logan shook his head, slightly annoyed that his mom was always making him question the existence of psychics.  
"It is. But they're not mine, I'm giving them up for adoption when they're born." Elisa said.  
"Well that's a wonderful thing, bringing life into the world to bless a family who will love and care for them. I miss having a little baby around. It truly is the purest form of life."  
"Well…" Logan saw no reason to keep trying to hide it now. "You have to keep it a secret for now but actually… me and Roman are planning on adopting the babies."  
"You are? You didn't tell me that part!" Barbera looked at Elisa who smiled smugly.  
"Yeah well that wasn't mine to tell but did you see his face when he thought you figured out I was pregnant with psychic intuition?"  
"You- well that explains that. But yes it's true, those twins are going to be ours."  
"Oh but that's wonderful! This is so much good news all at once, you two getting married and having babies!" Barbara smiled, getting teary eyed.  
"I wasn't expecting all this to happen so soon either but Roman kept talking about his gut feeling that we should be the ones to care for those children and suddenly I started getting the feeling too and here we are.. taking a leap of faith I guess."  
"This is exactly why I think Roman is so perfect for you, he makes you see the roads you're sometimes afraid to take. I know you don't believe in 'meant to be' but you have to agree this is a glorious turn of events."  
"I think it is mom. I really do. It's unexpected but that doesn't mean I'm not so, so happy it happened." Logan smiled.  
"I have to tell your father, he'll be thrilled he's always wanted grandchildren!"  
"No! No, he'll make a massive deal out of it, he'll stop the party, he'll make a speech, get the mic and start singing 'Take good care of my baby' or 'Having my baby' or god forbid any Tom Jones song!"  
"Sweetie he was going to do all that anyway this is your dad we're talking about." Barbara went off to find him and Logan chased after her still protesting.  
"Come on- please mom! I'll let you wave crystals over me! Or whatever it is you do for that cleansing thing- I'm begging you!" Elisa just watched and laughed. She looked down at her belly and patted it gently.  
"Come on babies, lets get some more canapés."


	13. A Punk and an Emo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tw: Remus being a recovering alcoholic will be a continued arc of his character

Remus was out on the balcony attached to the room they’d hired for the party. He would usually be the center of attention at these kind of things. Making people laugh, starting games and bets and party tricks. But tonight everything felt wrong. And he had to get away from the smell of alcohol before he did something stupid and erased all his hard work in one drink. Roman and Elisa were always saying how proud they were of him for staying strong for so long but it didn’t feel true. Remus felt weak and like he was on the edge of falling into the pit of addiction at any given moment. Everyone knew him to be the fun one, someone to turn to for light hearted banter and immature jokes. Remus knew they would hate him if they knew what really went through his head. The thoughts got so dark and upsetting, drinking was the only way to shut them up. Well, it was the easy way out at least. And an easy way out was feeling very appealing to Remus right now.  
“Oh- Excuse me.” Remus heard a voice and turned around. A guy had walked onto the balcony. He had dark hair falling into his eyes and a bit of make up around his eyes. He had a black hoodie over his purple button down and black jeans, as if while getting dressed he couldn’t decide between all the way casual and all the way smart so made it a combination that somehow worked. “I didn’t know someone was out here, I’ll leave, sorry.”  
“No, don’t go!” Remus blurted out. “I mean... you can stay if you want to.”  
“I just wanted some air, it was kinda stuffy in there.” Emo Boy said. Remus had already nicknamed him Emo Boy in his head.  
“It is stuffy. Come on, there’s plenty of air out here! It’s fresh, even. Fresh air. Please, breathe as much as you want. I'm not using it.”  
“Okay.” Emo Boy gave a flicker of a smile and came and stood next to Remus, putting his elbows on the balcony rail.  
“So… groom or groom?”  
“Kind of neither. I mean I think I’m friends with Roman but he’s more friends with Patton than he is me. And Patton pretty much dragged me here.”  
“Well I’m with Roman too, I’m his brother! Although I’m a fan of Logan’s too, if I wasn’t I wouldn’t be allowing him to marry my favourite twin.”  
“Kind of protective of him then?”  
“Very. But that’s only because he’s bailed me out so many times I owe him one. Don’t know what I’d do without him.” Remus was looking out at the street below. Emo Boy was watching him.  
“... I’m Virgil.” Virgil said, Patton’s voice echoing in his head about how he should try to put himself out there more.  
“Remus. Nice to meet you, ‘kind of a friend of my brother’s’”  
“You’re brother’s great it just takes me a while to warm up to new people... especially preppy drama kings like Roman no offense.”  
“None taken, that’s him in a nutshell. So, what would it take for you to speed up the warming up to people process? How do I get in your good books?” Remus looked over at Virgil with a small smile, sussing him out.  
“I- I don’t know.” Virgil was trying to look anywhere but Remus’s face, it was making him nervous in a ‘he’s cute and I think he’s flirting and I don’t know what to do way’  
"I've got an idea. You can ask me hm, 10 questions."  
"Not 20?"  
"I think I can do it in 10. If my answers impress you, you can bump me up to friend status even though we just met. Breaking your usual, warming up to people rule."  
"Fine, but I hate to disappoint you if we're just not compatible."  
"I won't be disappointed. I've got plenty of friends. My brother, his fiance and my knocked up friend who's having their kids. And she's like 3 friends in one so…" Remus smirked. "Come on, ask me anything. I'll be 1000% honest."  
"Okay…" Virgil thought for a minute. "What's your Hogwarts House?"  
"Now that is a good one! The answer is I don't know!" Remus grinned. "So, growing up I just wanted to be a gryffindor because that's where all the cool characters went. Then Roman decided he was a gryffindor and I was like no, I'm not being the George to your Fred, I'm gonna be different. So then I thought Slytherin… but I'm not cunning! I'm just loud! Then I toyed with Hufflepuff just to be different but one of their things is patience and I don't wait for anything. The others think I'm a Ravenclaw because apparently it's not all about book smarts, it's originality and creativity. But that's just a nice way of saying I'm too weird to fit any of them. I've decided if I was in the Harry Potter universe I'd be a goblin, or a dragon or one of those giant spider things." Virgil chuckled quietly.  
"You know what… good answer. You have one point."  
"It's a point system? I'm gonna ace this test! What's next?"  
"Okay, favourite food?"  
"Anything spicy enough to make me cry, next."  
"Music genre."  
"Ooh, okay. I'm a rock fan. And I know you're thinking, oh no he's one of those elitist rock fans well no- or I try not to be. I like all genres of rock and I'm kind of cheating because let's face it, all the best music ever made fits in the genre of rock somewhere."  
"I so agree, so where did your love for it start? Did you have a punk phase growing up?"  
"Baby I'm still in my punk phase, it's not going anywhere."  
"I'm 23 and I'm still in my teenage emo phase!" Virgil and Remus high fived, laughing.  
"You get it! Wait so full on emo, My Chemical Romance, Fall Out Boy, Evanescence?"  
"I did indeed mosh. Wore way too many bracelets and wrist bands, terrible attempts at eyeliner, I lived at Hot Topic and made posts about Gerard Way on MySpace. The full package."  
"Wow, you are literally my dream person."  
"You don't think it's weird and cringy to still like this stuff?"  
"No! I still love all that stuff, it's the definition of cool in my world. I don't fuck with cringe culture anyway." Remus smiled down at Virgil and their eyes met, in all the conversation he now noticed they had gotten closer to each other. "You know… some people have told me that I remind them of Gerard Way."  
"What people?" Virgil was smirking a little.  
"You know, people. That I made up my head. What you don't see it?" Remus leaned a little closer and he swore he could see something flicker in Virgil's eyes before he shyly moved away.  
"Uh- next question?"  
"Shoot."  
"Favourite movie?"  
"That's too hard! Can't you narrow it down a little?"  
"Animated?"  
"Hm… oh either Spirited Away or The Nightmare Before Christmas." Virgil's eyes widened. There were the magic words. His heart was won, game over. Remus smirked at Virgil's face. "I also like Shrek but I was trying to impress you with slightly more sophisticated answers."  
"Consider me impressed. So- is that the only Tim Burton you like or?"  
"Hell no, I love all Burton. Edward Scissorhands, Dark Shadows, Corpse Bride- what is that guy's obsession with Johnny Depp? Beetlejuice is a personal favourite of mine."  
"Oh yeah, I love Beetlejuice. And all of those really- the aesthetic is just so good…"  
"I have a feeling I don't have to go to all 10 questions to have officially impressed you."  
"Yeah, sure. You won the game because you mentioned Tim Burton. You figured out my weakness, congrats." Virgil put his hands in his pockets, glancing up at Remus's goofy, grinning face. And trying to remember the last time he'd found this easy to talk to someone he'd just met. Never. That had never happened. But in Remus's presence he felt completely at ease, like he'd known him forever.  
"What's my prize?" Remus asked.  
"You said it was my friendship status."  
"Yeah but I got your approval in five little questions that's gotta be a record. Don't I deserve something extra?"  
"Like what?"  
"Like… your number maybe? I want to have a way to call you in case I need someone to go to a My Chemical Romance concert with. Or we could watch a Tim Burton movie or.. whatever you want." Remus said, smiling softly.  
"Uh- yeah, number I can do that." Virgil pulled out his phone with flustered hands that were forgetting how to press buttons. Then he paused and glanced back at Remus. "Hold on… this is a set up isn't it."  
"What?"  
"You're Roman's brother. And the other day he was asking me all these questions about my ideal person to date and then you show up- and you're saying all the right things and you know you do actually remind me of Gerard Way!? It's freaking me out you're like a teenage fantasy come to life- You and Roman had to have planned this, is it a joke or something? Were you going to pull the cameras out at the fake date or what!?"  
"Virgil- Virgil! This isn't a set up! I swore I'd never heard about you until you came out here and started talking to me! And I thought you were cute and- like I said, kind of my dream person too, it's freaking me out too but in a good way?"  
"Oh.. oh good.." Virgil was blushing and throwing off his whole pale make up look but it was only making Remus smirk more. He called him cute…  
"It is weird Roman asking you those questions though… ah, I see what happened. Patton dragged you to this party did he?"  
"Yeah?"  
"Well my brother tends to like playing cupid with his friends. This is the only time I've known that it's not going terribly."  
"Those two set us up. Ugh, I wanna hate them but… I'm- kinda glad I met you."  
"I'm glad I met you too. But… we could show them and go in there pretending we hate each other."  
"Oh yeah! We could get into a fight and make them think it's all their fault."  
"Serves them right for messing with us." Remus said. The two of them smiled at each other and Virgil followed after Remus to go back inside. Virgil looked confused when Remus suddenly stopped. His face fell, he was staring at something across the room. Virgil followed his gaze to two guests that had entered the room.  
"Who is that?" He asked.  
"... my parents." Remus replied quietly.


	14. Party Crashers

"Oh no, please god no." Roman was looking frantically around for Logan, Elisa, anyone to save him from the immediate danger that had entered the room.  
"What are they doing here?" Remus appeared at Roman's side.  
"I- I don't know, I may have sent them an invitation?"  
"Roman!"  
"I didn't think they'd actually show up! And they didn't RSVP!"  
"What are we going to do?"  
"Well… if they came maybe they want to talk. Maybe they want to work things out."  
"What if I don't wanna work things out with them?" Remus folded his arms.  
"They're coming over. Look, I'll do the talking. Try not to pounce on them." Roman put on a small fake smile as Ronan and Sofia approached them. “Mom, Dad. I didn’t know you were coming.”  
“We were happy to hear from you when we got your invitation. We thought it might mean you wanted to have us in your life again. It really has been too long. Roman, Remus… you’ve both gotten… older!” Sofia looked nervous, but genuinely happy to see them. It was her Roman had missed the most and now seeing her again it was hard not to fall apart and cry out for her like a little kid.  
“Well, it has been 6 years” Remus grumbled. Roman nudged him slightly.  
“Yes, I did hope you would come and we could all start talking again. I’m willing to start over if you both are.”  
“That’s all we want. A new start.” Sofia nodded. Roman had been hearing her say “we” but his dad didn’t look nearly as enthused. He’d yet to make eye contact with him.  
“Dad?” He kept looking and Ronan glanced towards him.  
“Yes, this has gone on long enough. I’m willing to forget the past.”  
“I’m not.” Remus spoke up. “If you ever want to talk to me you have to own up to how you hurt me. How you hurt both of us. Come to me when you want to apologise for 18 years of my life. And even that will only get you so far.” Remus stormed past them, out the door. Roman watched him go frowning.  
“It’s going to take a lot longer to get through to him. But I’m sure he’ll come around eventually, this has just been really sudden. He wasn’t expecting to see you.”  
“Is he still drinking?” Ronan asked.  
“No.” Roman straightened up, suddenly feeling defensive. “He went to rehab and he’s been clean for 2 years. And I suggest you don’t say things like that in front of him. He’s been doing so well and made a very good life for himself.”  
“Right, I’m sorry.” Ronan said.  
“For just now or for everything else?”  
“Roman, you have to understand where we were coming from. First Remus started acting out and he was not only... he was with all the wrong people, flunking out of school, committing crimes- he was very close to going to prison.”  
“I know. But he got off on community service and he cleaned up his act.”  
“And then you came out and it seemed like another act of rebellion or you were copying him. I didn’t want you going down that path and throwing your life away.”  
“All it meant was that I’m gay. That I love men, that’s it. Me and Remus both grew up in your strict, religious, controlling family and we responded in different ways. He acted out and pushed you away. I put on an act and pretended to be your perfect son, fearing every day of my life you’d find out my secret. Until I couldn’t hold it in any longer, I had to let myself be happy. And now I am, dad. Can’t you see that? Now that me and Rem are just allowed to be ourselves we are so, so much happier.”  
“I believe you. I’m trying to come around to the idea, it’s just… not what we pictured for you.” Ronan looked around the room. “Who’s this person you’re marrying anyway?”  
“It’s Logan dad. You’ve met him.”  
“When?”  
“I introduced you to him as my boyfriend 6 years ago? You yelled at him, kicked me out the house, I lived at his house the rest of the summer until we went to college. He helped me get the last of my stuff out of my room and that was the last time I saw you.”  
“Oh. You’re still with him?”  
“Yes. And we’re very happy.”  
“I’d like to meet him, officially.” Sofia said. “I hope he can also forgive our past behaviour.” Roman looked around and waved Logan over.  
“Roman- I’m sorry, my mom found out about- oh.” Logan looked between Sofia and Ronan. “Mr and Mrs Sanders.”  
“Hello Logan. We received your invitation. I hope it’s alright that we came.” Sofia smiled at him.  
“Of course. I’m glad you’re deciding to support Roman.”  
“So who proposed to who?” Ronan asked. Logan felt like he was under interrogation all of a sudden.  
“I proposed to him, sir.”  
“Don’t you think you’re young to be getting married?”  
“No, I don’t think 24 is too young. We know what we want, we’ve been together for 6 years, we moved in together right after college.”  
“But it’s a significant commitment, how do you know you can provide for him? How do you know you won’t split up further down the line? Divorce is a lot more complicated than breaking up so why do you have to have to make it legal and binding?”  
“Mr Sanders, me and Roman support each other. We’re a family. Whatever comes our way, financially, emotionally or circumstance we will face it together. I know we don’t need to get married. He knows I want to spend the rest of my life with him whether we have a ceremony or not. But aside from the fact that us being recognised as in a committed relationship in the eyes of the law is beneficial for a number of reasons, if one of us went to the hospital for example and they were only allowing family in for visitors, I want to marry him so I can officially say that Roman Sanders is my husband.” Logan looked over at Roman who was gazing at him like he was falling in love all over again. “We want to celebrate our love with the people we love and vow that we will always love and support each other unconditionally. Something that you have regrettably forgotten to do in the past with your children, sir. If you want to make amends then we welcome you back but you have to earn favour with us, not the other way around.” Logan said, standing his ground with Ronan Sanders, one of the most intimidating men he knew. But this was everything he’d been dying to say since they’d kicked Roman out. Everything they deserved to hear. Ronan's defenses dropped and he nodded slowly.  
“Roman, this is going to take more than one apology, I know now. But can I at least begin with I’m sorry?”  
“Considering I’ve never heard you say it so genuinely, I’d say it’s a good start. Thank you.” Roman said.  
“Roman…” Sofia came over and held his arms, tears starting to form in her eyes. “I- I’ve been a horrible mother and- I miss you mi amor. I started to think you would never want me back in your life after how we treated you. But then I got your invitation and.. I hoped it meant I could have my sons back again.”  
“Oh mom.” Roman couldn’t stop himself from embracing her in a hug. “I’ll always be your son. We’ll work this out okay? We can talk after the party?”  
“I’m sorry.” She said quietly. “I want to be a better mother for you.”  
“Thank you for saying that, mom.” Roman smiled a little and pulled away. “Te quiero mama.”  
“Te quiero mucho Roman.” She smiled back. Roman put an arm around Logan’s waist and started leading him away.  
“We’ll be right back.” He said. Once they were far enough away Roman turned to Logan, grinning. “How you just stood up to my dad right now? Literally the hottest thing I’ve seen in my life.”  
“I don’t even know where it came from- it’s like it was all bottled inside for years!”  
“I think I want to marry you even more now.” Roman played with his tie, pulling him closer.  
“Roman!” Logan laughed, starting to blush.  
“I’m sorry but assertive Logan is the best, where’s he been lately?”  
“Oh, you know. Panicking about our future.” Logan smiled a little. “But after tonight… I want to prove everyone who says we can’t do this wrong and face the future head on. And no matter what, we will be better parents than them because our kids can be whoever they want to be and we are going to love them so much. We will never let them worry about being open with us because they know it won’t make a difference. We will always be their biggest supporters. We are going to be the best family. We’re going to build a home for them, you and me. And show your dad how real parenting is done.”  
“There’s my man!” Roman kissed Logan happily. “I love you so much right now, I can’t even explain it.”  
“I bet I love you more.”  
“You’re going to lose that bet, smart guy.” Roman was still gazing at him adoringly when he heard Dustin’s voice on the mic.  
“Attention everyone!” He had a glass of champagne in hand and everyone knew what was coming. Logan’s face fell. Oh no. “I’d just like to take a moment, to make a toast to these two amazing kids. My son, Logan, the pride of my heart-” He was sniffling already.  
“Here come the waterworks.” Elisa sighed, sidling up to Logan and Roman. “I’ve never known a guy who cries as much as your dad Lo.”  
“You get used to it.” Logan sighed, shaking his head as he watched him ramble on.  
“-I remember, holding him in my arms when he was just a newborn and- never wanting to let go. But we all have to let go eventually right? Let our kids make their own paths in life. We all want love, we all want someone to love us for who we are- Barb, where’s Barbara? There, my beautiful wife! I love you Barbara, you’re my world! I don’t know what I’d do without her. We’ve nearly been together 30 years and I want 30 more with this incredible woman.” This man was sobbing theatrical tears in front of the whole crowd. Roman looked between his dad and Dustin. Never were there two men more opposite forces to each other. Dustin was taking a second to wipe his eyes before he carried on. “Anyway, we’re here for Roman and Logan. No two people are better suited, you balance each other's qualities and make a perfect team. Roman, I love you son, take care of my Lolo like I know you will. Be good to each other and I wish you a long and happy marriage. To Roman and Logan!” He raised his glass and the room echoed the sentiment. Logan breathed in relief. That was actually a nice speech and at least he didn’t mention the- “Oh! And I almost forgot! Congratulations on the babies you two, I can’t wait to be a proud Grandpapa!” -of course. Logan slowly looked over at Ronan who was now giving him a formidable death glare.  
“Well, I’m glad you like hearing me argue with your dad because I have a feeling it’s going to happen again real soon.” Logan sighed.  
“Oh Logan, you’ve done enough. I’ll explain it to them.”  
“We’ll explain together.” Logan held Roman’s hand. “But first will you dance with me?” Roman’s expression softened and he smiled.  
“Do you ever have to ask that question? The answer will always be yes.” Logan led him to the dancefloor and pulled him close, swaying slowly together.  
“No matter what happens. You’ll always have a family. You have me and Remus and Elisa. My parents are already adopting you as son in law and they’re making a massive deal about it like they do everything.” Logan said quietly and Roman laughed, resting his head on Logan’s shoulder.  
“What would I do without you?”  
“The question is, Roman what would I do without you?” They slow danced and let everyone else fade away when all they could see was each other. The moment was only broken by Dustin getting up to sing 'It's Not Unusual' but the two of them laughed and danced along watching Logan's goofy, well meaning dad lighten the mood through the entire room. Roman didn't even notice his parents leaving the party. He was too busy having fun and dancing with his incredible fiance.


	15. Flight of Dreams

Roman answered his phone, seeing it was his father calling.  
"Hello?"  
"What did that crazy man mean when he said you two were having babies?"  
"Hi to you too dad. I would've liked the chance to talk but you left the party pretty quickly." Roman glanced over at Remus who was pulling a face at the mention of their father.  
"I didn't want to disrupt the entire party and I felt like my presence was dampening the mood but I need an explanation from you."  
"The crazy man said we're having babies because we're having babies."  
"How?"  
"Well traditionally a sperm and an egg get together-"  
"Roman Augustus Sanders."  
"Okay! Look, Elisa's pregnant with twins and we're adopting them when they're born."  
"Why?"  
"Because. She doesn't want them, she wants to give them up to a good home. We can provide that home for them."  
"You're not ready to have children, you can just rush into a thing like that! There are plenty of families who could adopt them, it doesn't have to be you!"  
"We've already decided and something you need to understand is that my life is no longer yours to dictate." Roman said, inspired by Logan's words the other day. He heard his dad give a quiet sigh.  
"Fine. But can we please talk about this in person?"  
"Not until next week. We're at the airport." Roman looked up, checking their place in line. They were almost at the front desk to get checked in. “We’re going to New York for the weekend.”  
“Who’s we?”  
“Me, Logan, Remus and Elisa.”  
“Ah, Remus.” Ronan left a small pause before speaking again. “Can you please tell him I’m sorry, and that I want to talk to him when he’s ready. I want to apologise in person to both of you. Not in the middle of your engagement party, that was a bad place to start talking. But I want to learn about who you both are now, and I want to do better”  
“Thanks dad, I’ll tell him.” Roman said and saw Remus looking at him. “Look, I gotta go, we can talk when I get back okay? Bye.” He hung up the phone.  
"Was he bothering you? Just decline the call next time." Remus said.  
"He said he's sorry and wants to talk to both of us in person."  
"I really don't want to feel like a disappointment again."  
"I think we have to give them a chance. We changed a lot these past few years, I'm sure they did too. Can't we hear them out and try to make things right with them. They're still our family."  
"Believe me I would love it if we could all be a family again. I just don't know if dad can ever be humble enough to change that much."  
"I think he wants to. And that's a start."  
"Okay." Remus looked up at Roman and nodded. "One more chance. That's all they get."  
"Thanks Rem." Roman smiled. They were soon at the front of the line and Logan led their group to one of the check in desks. Any trip they took, he was their leader and coordinator. The rest of them would be lost without him, as evident by the one time the three of them tried to go on a road trip. It ended with Logan driving out to save them, broken down on the side of the road, miles in the wrong direction of their destination.  
A couple hours later they were finally seated on the plane to New York City. Roman next to Logan and Elisa a few rows away with Remus. Roman took the window seat as always.  
"Oh my god." Roman said suddenly, hit by a thought.  
"What is it?" Logan asked, hoping they hadn't forgotten something important.  
"I just realised this is the last trip we're going to be able to take for a while. After the babies come they'll be no time for things like that for ages."  
"We better make the most of this one then."  
"Yeah… Logan? Maybe we should take this time to talk about some things we haven't talked about yet."  
"I think that's a good idea. But can it wait until after the flight attendant gives the safety instructions, I think it's very important to listen to those."  
"Okay." Roman chuckled, watching Logan listening intently in case an emergency really did happen. Once they were in the air they started talking. "First of all," Roman began, "I need a new job."  
"Really, are you sure?"  
"Yes. Acting is great but in the past couple years I've joined different productions all over the place and been on tour twice, it's way too unstable for our new life. Who knows, maybe I'll go back to it one day but right now I need a job to help us with the cost of a wedding and twins and possibly a new house. Preferably something I'll enjoy doing, even better something I can do from home so I can still take care of the kids."  
"Well I can help with this. Let's see." Logan got out a notebook and pen. "You're creative, musically gifted, you like sticking with projects and seeing it to the end. He noted down a few more qualities. "There's plenty of things you're good at, singing, writing, composing, acting."  
"Oh you're too kind. Keep going." Roman smiled, leaning over to watch him write.  
"Well, a lot of social media influencers work from home. Or you could start a small business or maybe even write a book. You've written short stories and scripts before."  
"All of those are great but take so long to get off the ground and become a stable income. I don't want you to always be the one supporting my dreams."  
"I'll always support you Roman, we'll find a way no matter what you choose and it's so important that you enjoy what you're doing."  
"Hm." Roman kept looking at the list of jobs, deep in thought.  
"You know it's funny that you bring up careers because I've been meaning to talk about mine."  
"What? What happened with the school, what's wrong?"  
"Nothing, it's just after we found out it was twins.. I just kept thinking about how much I want to provide a really good life for them and we need more money to do that. So I started asking at the university. Their science department has offered me a place on their research team before but… I don't know, I really liked the idea of teaching young people, and I did like working at the high school."  
"Yeah, you're an amazing teacher! If you were my teacher I would have got way better grades!"  
"I practically was your teacher, I helped you study for every test."  
"And I passed them all thanks to you!"  
"Well, I have enjoyed it. But I think it's due time for a lot of changes right now. Plus a University job means a higher income meaning you can have your dream wedding-"  
"Oh yay!" Roman grinned, putting his hands together.  
"-and we can buy a real house in a nice neighborhood. No more busy city life, no more getting ubers everywhere and climbing the stairs to the apartment because they never fix the elevator. It's suburban family life for us darling."  
"And I can't wait." Roman glanced around and no one seemed to be looking so he felt free to give Logan a quick kiss. "As long as working there is what you really want to do."  
"I know I'll enjoy it. I'll still get to teach sometimes, I'll get to give lectures plus they have a truly gorgeous lab space I took a tour of once. I can't wait to get my hands on that brand new equipment."  
"Oo, do you get to wear a lab coat and everything? Super hot."  
"Don't tease, I know I'm a nerd."  
"No really, chemical researchers are my thing." Roman smirked. "Now if I could just figure out what I'm meant to do with my life…"  
"There's time Roman."  
"Not much time! From the books I've been reading, 9 months tends to fly by pretty fast."  
"Okay well, we have the weekend then. No matter what you decide to do, I know you'll be amazing at it."  
"Thanks babe." Roman leaned his head on Logan's shoulder and sighed happily.  
"So. You really like the lab coat look huh?"  
"Mhm. Very attractive. I also like guys who wear glasses and neckties and who like to talk for a very long time about science or psychology or the Star Trek universe."  
"Sounds like I have a pretty decent chance then. Personally, I'm a fan of stylishly dressed theatre kids who make red their signature colour." Logan smiled and the two of them napped for the rest of the flight.

The gang had a blast the whole trip. It was like they were college kids again, back on their old adventures. Elisa was craving everything that food carts could offer, Remus was taking photographs of everything with his new camera and Roman just loved how it felt to walk the streets of New York. Where so many stars had come before him. Going around Broadway felt bittersweet because his dream to perform there would have to be put on pause for a while. If he ever doubted himself he reminded himself of his new dream. That house, that neighborhood, that family that would be him, Logan and the twins. That was what his heart truly wanted. They were in line for showing their tickets at Phantom of the Opera (a broadway pick that all of them could appreciate in some way) when Roman turned to Logan.  
"Hey. I might be taking a break from performing, but I could help other performers! I could be a vocal coach, people could come to me to help them with singing and I can help them prepare for auditions! They could come to our house or maybe I can get an office space somewhere. And I could make a YouTube channel to spread publicity of my business and I can make videos about singing and acting tips, maybe even post covers or record my own songs who knows!" Roman was getting more excited with the idea as he was saying it. Logan smiled proudly.  
"That is an amazing idea Roman. It's reliable and it lets you follow your passions."  
"I know! It's perfect." Roman held Logan's hand. "My whole life is pretty close to perfect right now. If I can just get my parents to make up with Remus and be supportive of our choice to be parents we can make it completely perfect."


	16. The Sanders Reunited

Logan was the one to finally ring the doorbell. Roman and Remus had been standing there for too long, not moving.  
“You might as well get it over with.” He said, taking Roman’s hand for comfort.  
“I haven’t been back here in 6 years..” He breathed.  
“I came back 2 years ago.” Remus said and they both looked at him. “I never went in.” He explained. “The support group said I should face them, to help with closure and everything. But I just stood here and.. eventually left.” Roman looked at Remus sadly. Remus took a deep breath and smiled bravely. “But not this time. Not running away again.” Sofia opened the door for them.  
“Hi boys, thank you for coming. Remus.. I-” She began but Remus sprang forward and hugged her. She hugged him back, holding him tightly. “I’m sorry.” She said.  
“No- I’m sorry. I was the worst son ever- and I left and said horrible things to you but I didn’t mean it I was really not doing good-”  
“Shh, mijo..” She held him close and stroked his hair and he sniffled, tears falling down his face. “I made mistakes and you made mistakes. But I’ve missed you every day and regretted everything I did to push you away. I think we’ve both been too stubborn and scared to make things right. But we can start now can’t we?”  
“Yeah mom.” Remus pulled back, smiling through his tears. “We can start now.” Sofia let them all in, wiping a few tears of her own away.  
“Your father is at work, he’ll join us later.” she said and they all came to sit in the living room.  
“It hasn’t changed at all. I missed this house.” Roman said looking around.  
“I hope we can have you around more often.” Sofia looked between Roman and Logan. “So are you really adopting twins?”  
“Yes and we owe you the full story. You know Elisa?”  
“Of course, how is she?”  
“She’s been doing good. She dances for a living so she’s happy. But her boyfriend- her ex boyfriend wasn’t very nice to her. They’re broken up now but she found out she was pregnant. She didn’t want to have a baby so she decided she was going to give it up to a family who did want them and would take care of them. We thought about it and we decided that family should be us. I know it’s kind of drastic..”  
“No I understand. It’s hard to describe the feelings you get when you know you’re going to be a parent. That instinctual feeling that you have to prepare, to make a home fit for them. Have you had that feeling yet?”  
“Yes! I feel like there’s not enough time in the world to be ready but we’re trying to get our lives together.”  
“When they come you’ll be ready, it just happens. Remember, I know what it’s like to have twins.”  
“Any advice you have would be much appreciated.” Logan said.  
“Keep your eyes open. These two were little wild things.” Elisa chuckled. “They’d keep their energy up all day and still wouldn’t go to sleep at night.”  
“I can imagine, they’re just as energetic now.” Logan smiled.  
“I think I have some old photo albums somewhere.” Sofia went off looking on the bookshelf.  
“Please, I have never seen childhood pictures of them!” Logan perked up and Roman rolled his eyes.  
“No, so embarrassing.” He whined.  
“I wanna see! I was the cuter one.” Remus said smugly.  
“You were the messier one.” Roman corrected. Sofia brought over the large hardcover photo album and sat in between them. From the first page, baby pictures of the twins. Lying side by side in the crib.  
“How sweet, which is which?” Logan asked.  
“That’s Roman, and that’s Remus.” Sofia pointed them out.  
“How did you tell them apart when they were that young?”  
“Motherly intuition. And I dressed them differently just to be sure. Roman was in red and Remus in green.”  
“We looked like Santa’s elves.” Roman said. “I think there is a picture of us somewhere in elf costumes” Sofia gave Logan the album to flip through and he and Roman whispered, laughed and reminisced over all the pictures. Remus went off to help Sofia with dinner, the two of them continuing to apologise over all the missed years and promise the new ones would be better.  
“So cute.” Logan was at the toddler photos, little Roman in dungarees playing in the garden.  
“I’m going to be taking even more pictures when we have ours. Every memory will be documented.”  
“I know you will. Gosh.. before we know it we’ll have children to be taking photographs of.”  
“Time’s running out.” Roman nodded, turning the pages until they got to the teenage years and Remus showed up less and less. “Logan… I let Remus down. It wasn’t just my parents, he pushed even me away back then. He never let me help when I tried but I know I didn’t try hard enough.”  
“Whatever happened back then, you were the one who stuck with him throughout his recovery. He knows you care, your relationship is so strong now and you're both better because of it." Logan put a hand on Roman's shoulder. "When Remus needed you most you stuck by him." Roman looked up hearing the front door open. Their father came in. Roman got up and went over to face him.  
"You better be ready to give the most meaningful apology of all time." Roman said, deadly serious and almost scary.  
"I'm sorry-"  
"Not me, Remus! I don't matter, I found my place just fine in the world, he could've ended up on the streets, in prison or dead and you still wouldn't care!? If you want him back in your life you have to prove that you would be there for him if he got bad again, he doesn't need your judgement he needs people who will care and be there for him no matter what!"  
"May I speak now?"  
"Yes! And make it good!"  
"Roman.." Ronan looked at his son, pausing as he tried to form his words with care. "You both deserve apologies, and I'll give you yours first. It's taken a lot of time for me to process… the guilt that came from driving you two away. I guarded my emotions, much like my father before me and I've also had problems with drinking before.. if anyone should've been there for Remus it should've been us. And we were very influenced by the church at the time, convinced you being gay was a sin. We thought you had to change but we were wrong, we had to change. I like to think we have but we have a long way to go.." Ronan took a shaky breath. Roman for the first time saw his dad getting emotional without trying to hide it or suck it up. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry I wasted so much time but I don't want to waste any more. You're my son. I love you." Roman couldn't respond with words. He just stepped forward and hugged his dad, Ronan held him in his arms. He looked up and noticed Remus in the doorway.  
"How much did you hear?" He asked.  
"Oh, about from when Roman started defending me." Remus smiled a little and came over, joining the hug.  
"Remus. I-" Ronan started.  
"I know dad. Me too." Remus said quietly. Remus didn't respond much to words. Words could mean anything, he knew he himself babbled on about a lot he didn't mean. But his father's tears meant enough. And he was tired of fighting them coming back into his life. He said he'd give them a chance again and he'd meant it. He wanted a family, this time they'd get it right and he'd have the loving family he'd always wanted.


	17. Remy the Highly Caffeinated Wedding Planner

Logan was a week into his new job at the University. At some point he was bound to wander into the nearby coffee shop for a caffeine fix. This would have to be the place to fit into his new routine of lectures and research in the lab. So then, this place being completely new to him, how could he have known who else was a regular at this particular coffee shop. He was waiting for his drink when he looked up at the door opening. His eyes widened a little in shock, I mean what were the chances.. Remy Price. Older sure, but still with that "I'm too cool for you" stance, still with those shades that summer through winter were his signature look. And to see him again at a coffee shop of all places felt like the universe was being too obvious. Remy, who drank coffee like his life depended on it. Remy, who could be getting it from any coffee shop in the city and happened to be here. Remy, who Logan used to date. It was an on and off fling, it certainly never turned into anything serious, a year before the fateful school play when Logan started growing closer to Roman and realised he might have a chance with him. But there was one summer when he and Remy were inseparable. He was a teenager exploring his sexuality, what else was there to do but start talking to the only other openly gay guy in school.  
Logan waited anxiously while Remy ordered, wondering if he should say anything. He didn't have to, Remy sooned turned his way and locked eyes with him.  
"Logan Thomas, is that really you?" He sauntered over, smiling. Logan nodded.  
"Hello Remy.”  
"Well how have you been it's been ages. I can't believe I haven't talked to you since high school!"  
"I'm well. You're looking.. healthy." Logan was panicking internally. What are you supposed to say when you run into an ex that you haven't seen for six years that you've almost forgotten existed because you're hopelessly in love and even thinking about dating someone else in the past makes you slightly nauseous?  
"I'm 90% caffeine, 10% stress." Remy smiled. "I haven't seen you around these parts before and I'm in here all the time. They practically owe half their profit to me. I think they should name a drink 'The Remy'"  
"You haven't changed a bit have you?"  
"Oh well, still cute and sassy, still a bitch without coffee in my system. Slightly more stable than I used to be though?"  
"Not party jumping every weekend?"  
"No, I get too tired by the weekend! I run my own business. I used to be fun now I'm ugh, grown up. It sucks."  
"That's actually very impressive good for you Remy."  
"I can't keep a man though. You were the last normal guy I ever dated since then it's been non committal douchebags and fuck boys. It doesn't help that for my job I meet couples who are so nauseatingly in love you can't help but feel happy for them but wish it was you in their place. Anyway, what about you? Anyone special in your life?"  
"Uh, well you know Roman from our school?"  
"Yeah, I remember Roman. Pretty, popular, so obviously gay but pretending to be straight to avoid the humiliation we had to face."  
"Well he came out. And we dated secretly near the end of high school and now we're.. engaged."  
"Shut up! That is like a romance movie come to life! I am so happy for you and so jealous. That Roman guy stole my movie ending!"  
"Sorry?"  
"I am totally kidding babes, happy for you really. The important question is who is your wedding planner?"  
"Oh, we've been too busy lately to hire one. At first we were going to plan the wedding ourselves but with how crazy our lives are right now I don't know how we can."  
"Nah, honey you need a wedding planner. You need someone who has connections. Who can keep on top of everything while you get on with your lives. Someone like me!” Remy pulled out a business card and handed it over to Logan. “I’m the best you can find out there, plus I can give you a discount since we’re friends.”  
“Thank you.. I’ll have to ask Roman about it.”  
“Of course, anything to make hubby happy.” Remy collected his coffee from the counter. “Well I have to go, off to haggle with a particularly stubborn florist. But I can win him over, I always do. Give me a call after you’ve talked with Roman.”  
“I will.”  
“Logan Thomas. It’s a small world after all.” Remy winked and swiftly left the shop. Logan sighed, shaking his head.  
“Nope, no, not a chance.” Roman said as soon as Logan brought it up with him later.  
“Can you think of any other ways to say no?” Logan said, sitting across from him at the dinner table.  
“No, non, nein, no way.” Roman recited. “I don’t want that guy planning our wedding.”  
“Alright we don’t have to. It’s just… he did say we could have a discount and that would be helpful.”  
“He’s your ex.”  
“We were 16. It didn’t mean anything, I’m sure it didn’t mean anything to him. It was purely physical.”  
“That makes me feel better.” Roman huffed. “What? Why are you smiling?”  
“Nothing.. I’ve just never seen you jealous before.”  
“It's not funny! I wish I could go back in time and beat him to you. So I was the only person you were ever with.”  
“Yes, but you can’t. You have to deal with the fact that there was someone before you. But once I’d met you there could never be anyone else. Because you’re the only person I’ve ever fallen in love with.” Logan saw Roman fighting a smile that eventually won him over.  
“So when you saw him today, you didn’t think for a second what your life might’ve been like with him? You didn’t have a daydream of you living it up with smooth talking coffee boy?”  
“Hell no.” Logan smirked. He came around the table and sat on Roman’s lap. “The only thought that crossed my mind is how glad I was that I broke up with him when I did. If I’d had still been with him when the play was on I might not have talked to you as much, or let myself catch feelings out of loyalty for him. And then we wouldn’t have ended up together. And that’s just about the most terrible thing I can think of. You’re the only one for me, Roman.” Roman was smiling, leaning his face closer with a twinkle in his eye.  
“Honestly?”  
“Would I lie to you?”  
“I don’t think you’re capable of it. You’re the worst liar I’ve ever met.” Roman closed the gap between them. Logan wrapped his arms around Roman’s neck as they kissed. When they pulled back they were locked in a gaze with each other until Roman closed his eyes in defeat. “Do you think he’s a good wedding planner?”  
“I looked him up, to be fair his reviews are excellent, he clearly knows what he’s doing.”  
“So we’re internet stalking him now?”  
“Roman.”  
“Okay, okay. You can hire him.” Roman sighed. “I mean.. The discount would be helpful and we need to get a start on plans if we’re ever going to get married by the time the babies come.”  
“I swear, there’s no need for you to be jealous of him. He’s got nothing on you.”  
“You don’t think he’s more handsome?” Roman looked up at Logan. Logan smiled, pushing Roman’s hair back.  
“You are far more handsome. And pretty, and beautiful and gorgeous. Please tell me if I’m forgetting any adjectives.”  
“...Sexy?”  
“Oh yes, you’re plenty of that.” Logan chuckled. “And very humble about it too.”  
“I’m sorry, I know it’s dumb. But I’ve never been with anyone else my whole life. I can’t even imagine it because you’ve always been the one for me.”  
“We’re lucky. We didn’t have to go through much of life without each other before we found each other. And now we have, this is it for us. We get all of the rest of our lives to love each other and grow old together.” Logan leaned in to kiss him again and then pressed their foreheads together. “You’re the only owner of my heart, and that will always be.”  
“I love you Logan..”  
“I love you too Roman.” The two sat in warm, joy filled silence before Roman’s mind had to turn back around to the original subject.  
“Is Remy single?”  
“He said he was, why? Oh Roman, please don’t.”  
“Because maybe…”  
“Please.”  
“... I could find someone for him!”  
“Do you ever stop playing cupid?”  
“I prefer the term playing Eros, that’s his proper Greek name.”  
“Haven’t you learned from your attempt with Remus and Virgil?”  
“That’s only because Remus left the party before I had the chance to introduce them!”  
“What am I going to do with you?”  
“I don’t know… you could marry me for a start.” Roman made Logan smile again and the two went back to their usual banter. Roman didn’t know that Remus had met Virgil that night, and that he’d predicted that they'd get along and be a perfect match for each other. The problem was that Remus had left before getting Virgil’s phone number and now he was left the Prince Charming of a Cinderella scenario. Unlike the prince, Remus wouldn’t go running around with a shoe to find his mystery stranger.  
Virgil was cleaning up around the shop when he heard the door shutting.  
“Sorry, we’re just-” He turned and saw none other than the guy from the party. Remus grinned, panting like he’d been running and wet from the rain outside. “Closing…” Virgil finished, a little breathless all of a sudden.  
“Oh can’t you keep it open for a few minutes for your teenage fantasy?” Remus said with a smirk. Virgil covered his face with his sleeves pulled around his hands.  
“Oh god- I actually said that didn’t I..”  
“You did. I haven’t stopped thinking about it or you since the party.” Remus said and Virgil slowly uncovered his face and looked up at him.  
“How.. how did you find me?”  
“Uh, well.” Remus shuffled his feet guiltily. “You know, the internet’s a pretty cool thing.. Roman’s facebook friends with Patton who you mentioned and through him I found you. Is that weird? It’s just- you were going to give me your number and then I ran off- stupid family stuff, nothing to do with you..”  
“It’s fine. I’m glad you did. I wanted to message Roman and ask him about you but I got so anxious about it..”  
“Well I had to find you. Finding someone like you who I have fun with, who gets me, doesn’t happen for me. Hardly ever.”  
“Me neither! I mean I am so bad with dating, the beginning bit is usually so awkward and I can never tell if the other person likes me or if they’re faking it..”  
“I hate fake people,” Remus said, stepping over to him. “And I like you Virgil.”  
“Cool..” Virgil was getting nervous, this time the good kind. The kind that spreads all over and tingles feeling like electricity. “I mean- I like you too. You won me over with what you told me so far..”  
“I want to know more about you Virgil Storm. I just happened upon your social medias while I was looking you up....”  
“Oh really.”  
“And I found you work at this music store, I can’t believe I’ve never been in here before.” Remus took a look around, the rows of guitars, the keyboards and a piano near the back. Shelves of sheet music and guide books. “Now this is a cool place to work.”  
“I guess. It’s usually really chill and most people like coming in here to look around by themself or just play instruments so it’s not the chipper kind of ‘how can I help you this fine day’ kind of retail.”  
“Which you would hate.”  
“Yup.” Virgil watched him look around the place.  
“Do you play?”  
“Uh, yeah I’m a… decent guitar player I guess.”  
“I’ll be the judge of that. Pick your instrument and play me something.” Remus sat on a stool, smiling expectantly. Virgil saw no way out of it and carefully took down a purple electric guitar. It was his favourite and he would spend quiet moments during the day staring at it in all it’s beauty. One day he would buy it, but for now he hooked it up to an amp and sat down next to Remus.  
“What should I..?”  
“Anything you want.” Remus smiled and watched him. Virgil took a moment to prepare, the happy nerves spurring him on to start playing. He hadn’t known what he was going to sing until the words came on their own. A Paramore song that must’ve been stuck in his subconscious for this very moment.  
“When I was younger I saw my daddy cry, and curse at the wind.” He sang in his low soft voice. “He broke his own heart and I watched as he tried to reassemble it.” Remus’s shoulders relaxed, he leaned forward as he listened. “And my momma swore that she would never let herself forget. And that was the day I promised I’d never sing of love, if it does not exist. But darling, you are the only exception. You are the only exception…” Virgil dared to look up and locked eyes with Remus. Virgil kept on singing, lost in the music and those wide, sincere, dark brown eyes. The anxiousness fluttered in his chest in the way some might describe as butterflies. It felt warm inside, Virgil could swear his heart was beating louder and louder, making his feelings known. When he’d finished the last chord hung in the air between them.  
“Virgil..” Was all Remus could seem to say. Virgil shrugged, taking the guitar strap off and putting it down carefully.  
“Yeah.. that’s not very impressive to be fair, I can do higher level songs than that I just didn’t know what you..” Virgil froze, looking down and seeing Remus had taken his hand. He blushed, looking between their hands and Remus’s wide eyed gaze.  
“You’re incredible.” Remus said softly. He let go of Virgil’s hand. “Sorry, that was-”  
“It’s okay.” Virgil smiled, the glow still in his cheeks. “Um, I have to lock up now.”  
“Right, gotcha.”  
“But you could.. Walk me back to my apartment? And come inside, if you want to..” Virgil fiddled with the edge of his sleeve. “You know, we could watch one of those Tim Burton movies or whatever..”  
“I’d love to.” Remus said immediately and Virgil looked up at him again. Virgil would never describe himself as bold but there are times when those nerves that usually drag him down and drive him crazy do some good. Sometimes they give him the push he needs. He got up from his chair and came close to Remus, standing over him. Before he could let himself change his mind, he took Remus’s face in his hands and kissed him. Remus melted into it, pulling him closer and closing his eyes. The two separated with a fraction of space between their lips. Virgil’s eyes, half closed and dreamy. Now Remus was the one struggling to string a sentence together.  
"That was- you- I mean, wow…" he breathed.  
"I didn't go too fast did I?" Virgil whispered.  
"No, no. I was surprised in a good way. Maybe if I was prepared it would be even better the second time." Remus said, pulling him back. Virgil laughed quietly and went back to kissing him. These were the times he thanked his anxiety for helping him instead of holding him back. And as the rain fell out on the street he was kissing this cute, funny guy who made him feel… wanted.


	18. A Place to Call Home

Time passed. Things began to fall into place. Logan with his job at the university, Roman starting to get some students coming for singing lessons, Remy becoming the overseer of their every move concerning the wedding. He had been getting a lot done and the booking and hiring of everything was coming together. Roman and Logan had to trust that everything would be ready in time. Their lives were so busy they did have much brain power left between them to focus on the wedding so it was up to Remy to get everything right.  
Roman and Logan's main attentions were on the twins whose arrival was getting closer each day. Elisa was nearly 6 months and carrying her baby bump with pride.  
"You know, it's not as bad as I thought it would be." She said, lying across the sofa eating cookie dough ice cream. Her cravings had given her an intense sweet tooth. "I always get a seat on the bus, people hold doors open for me and let me skip lines. Pregnancy privilege I call it."  
"And we'll keep treating you like a queen as long as you're carrying our children." Roman smiled.  
"I don't mind that at all. I- oh!" She made a face. Roman sat up with a worried look.  
"What- what's wrong? Are you in pain?"  
"No.. I think I felt a kick.." She put a hand on her stomach.  
"Really? Can I feel it?" Roman asked and Elisa nodded, putting his hand in the spot she'd felt it. Roman waited in anticipation until he felt the movement against his hand. He beamed, delighting in the first bit of contact with his children. "Hey there baby! It's me, your Papa.. Logan says they can hear voices at this stage. Oh- Logan! Logan come in here!" Roman called to the study and Logan raced out to see the problem.  
"What, is Elisa okay??"  
"I'm fine, geez you guys jump to the worst conclusion." Elisa rolled her eyes.  
"The baby's kicking!" Roman said and Logan relaxed, coming around to sit with them.  
"Really.." Logan said and placed his hand on Elisa's belly. "I don't feel it."  
"Huh, they were doing it just a second ago." Roman frowned.  
"You know, Logan's book said that they can hear music in the womb. And if you play a song for them often they can recognise it when they're born." Elisa said.  
"Ooh good idea! We should start them on Queen B while they're young." Elisa highfived Roman for that, both Beyonce fans.  
"You should sing to them Roman, get them used to your voice." Logan said.  
"Tell them science facts so they can get used to yours." Roman quipped back.  
"Go on Ro, sing for them." Elisa encouraged.  
"Alright.." Roman thought for a moment and began to sing 'When you wish upon a star'. Logan smiled as he listened.  
"I can feel them kicking." He said quietly.

A few days later Patton called for Roman to come over as soon as he could.  
"A house just became available in our neighbourhood and it would be perfect for you and Logan!" Patton pushed the stroller as they walked down the street to take a look at it. Roman stared, taking it in. It was perfect.. the kind of family home he'd been dreaming about.  
"Patton it's lovely.."  
"I can give you the person to call if you and Logan want to take a look inside and consider buying it."  
"Thank you. You know Logan's been the one surprising me recently. I think it's time I give him the same treatment." And that was how Logan ended up blindfolded and being led by Roman down the driveway of the house.  
"I'm scared, what are you planning?" Logan said as Roman stopped him in a strategic position.  
"You can see for yourself now. Go on, look." Roman smiled and watched as Logan uncovered his eyes and looked up at the house.  
"Oh Roman.."  
"This could be it. Our house to start our life together and raise the twins in. Come inside, it's amazing!" Roman took his hand and guided him in. "It's such an open space, with the windows letting all that light in.. picture it we could have a dining table around here and the family room is over there. Oh look at this kitchen isn't it pretty!"  
"It is." Logan was looking around, taking it in. And from the moment he'd stepped inside it had felt so right for them. He followed Roman out to the garden.  
"Look at all the room they have to play and that tree! That is an optimal childhood tree. Maybe we could build a treehouse, and they can invite their friends to come in it and have the best time ever! And you've always said you wished you could have a real garden, not just houseplants. Well here you can have one! And there are four bedrooms upstairs, ours and one for each of the twins and then one could be a study or I can turn it into my studio for teaching!" Roman was bursting with joy as he explained.  
"You really love it don't you?" Logan said with a smile.  
"I really, really, really love it! This house is calling to me, Logan. Tell me you can't feel it just calling to you!" Roman came over and put his hands on Logan's shoulders. "This house was made for us."  
"Well I don't know about that but.. I do like it too. And I can see us living here."  
"Right? So what do you say?"  
"I say I have to look over all the details before I can make a decision."  
"But if everything's fine?"  
"And I need to make sure we can afford it."  
"And if we can??"  
"Roman.."  
"I'm not letting go of this place, I'm sorry I love it too much."  
"Well.. I guess this is our home then." Logan said and Roman squealed and flung his arms around his neck, hugging him tightly. Logan had already caved, it was worth it to indulge in the picture he'd created. Him, Roman and their children, living in this house. A home of their very own.

Moving day came along within a matter of weeks. The Thomas-Sanders' lives seemed to be on fast forward these days. Janus, Patton, Remus and his new boyfriend Virgil were all there to help. Elisa was helping by directing where all the furniture should go, coordinator and interior designer.  
"Remus, what are you doing, you can't lift that dresser by yourself." She shook her head at him.  
"Is that a challenge?" He carried on trying to hoist it up the stairs. Virgil was fighting a grin watching him.  
"Don't hurt yourself baby." He carried on taking his boxes to the kitchen. Patton was in there, organizing things while keeping an eye on Sierra who was sitting happily in her car seat.  
"Thanks Virge, I think this box is bowls and plates." Patton was in a rhythm of unpacking boxes while bopping to the music playing.  
"Baby Shark again?" Virgil groaned.  
"Sierra likes it!"  
"I think you like it Pat."  
"It's a fun tune alright?" Patton shook his hips making Virgil laugh.  
"You are such a dad."  
"Thank you!" Patton smiled wide. Virgil went back out to the moving truck to bring in more boxes.  
"Boo!" Micah jumped out from behind a stack of boxes in the truck. Virgil put a hand to his chest, faking surprise.  
"Micah, you really scared me!" He said and Micah giggled. Virgil picked him up.  
"Where did your dad go?"  
"Upstairs."  
"Let's go scare him."  
"Yeah!" Micah said and Virgil carried him back up the stairs. Remus was up at the top of them next to the dresser. He was bent over catching his breath.  
"Taking a break, tough guy?" Virgil said. Remus straightened up, acting casual.  
"What, that little thing? Easy. Have you seen these guns?" Remus flexed his arm and Virgil rolled his eyes at him.  
"Weirdo."  
"Cutie."  
"Shut up." Virgil smirked. Micah looked between them.  
"Remus, are you my Uncle too? Because Virgil's my Uncle and you're dating him." Virgil blushed and Remus grinned.  
"Sure kid, if you want me to be."  
"Cool. I'll tell my friends at school Captain Squidbeard is my Uncle."  
"That's right." Remus laughed. "Making you an honorary pirate."  
"Where's Janus?" Virgil asked. Remus pointed to one of the bedrooms. Virgil put a finger to his lips and Micah giggled as they creeped up to the door. They stood, hidden until they saw a shadow approching and jumped out, screaming together. Janus really did flinch and Micah and Virgil laughed at him.  
"Funny. Very funny." Janus deadpanned but broke into a smirk at Micah's giggles.  
"We got you dad!"  
"That you did. Does anyone actually want to help me with putting this crib together. The instructions make absolutely zero sense."  
"I can help! I'm real handy with that stuff!" Remus came into the bedroom and knelt down to start helping Janus with the assembly. Micah wanted to help too and Remus told him what to hand him and when. Virgil watched his best friend and his boyfriend bonding over ikea furniture and felt relieved that these two parts of his life he loved could coexist.  
"Not much of a fixer upper Janus?" Remus said as he was tightening the screws between two pieces.  
"No I'm hopeless. Patton's only slightly better, but after a tragic incident with him trying to hang a picture up he's not allowed to use hammers anymore. There's cute clumsiness and then there's being a walking health hazard. But.. he's my walking health hazard. He, the kids and Virgil are the most important things in the world to me. So I'm warning you now to be good to him. If I ever find out that you've hurt him any way I will make you live to regret it."  
"Janus.." Virgil said. "Leave him alone."  
"No, he's has every right to be protective and I respect it." Remus said. "Janus I will never hurt Virgil. I promise."  
"Let's hope you don't break that promise." Janus said. "Oh good, you figured out step 33, I never understood what that diagram was saying."  
"Well that's pretty much it, just slot these two pieces together.." Remus and Janus fit the last of the crib together and it stood perfectly stable. "We did it! Go team!" Remus highfived Micah.  
"Finally, it's over." Janus said.  
"Uh, guys? They're having two babies." Virgil remided them and guestured to the second box containing another flatpack crib. Janus groaned, Remus bounced.  
"Yes! More building!" He cheered.  
"I'm just going to take a little break." Janus lay down on the nusery floor, fake snoring. Micah poked him but he kept up the sleeping act.  
"Wake up dad!" Micah leaned over him, starting to look concerned when Janus suddenly "woke up" and grabbed Micah. Tickling him till he screamed with laughter.

Roman and Logan looked around the empty apartment. The last of their things had been removed and this was it. They'd soon be leaving their first home together for good. Logan took a walk around the place, remembering the first day they'd moved in.  
Fresh from college the sweethearts had spent the day alternating between playful bickering and shameless flirting.  
"We can't keep getting distracted, we need to unpack everything." Younger Logan said.  
"Mm, why right now? We have plenty of time for that!" Roman said.  
"If we put it off we won't get it done for months and I don't want to live in a perpetually disordered living space."  
"Say more big words." Roman sauntered over to him.  
"No- I'm not letting you distract me again."  
"I'm distracting now, am I?" Roman snatched the box Logan was holding out of his hands.  
"Hey, now come on!" Logan chased Roman around the kitchen table, both annoyed and amused. Eventually he stopped in one place and Roman put the box behind his back.  
"You can organize tomorrow and put everything in it's proper place but right now I just want to relish the fact that I get to live with my boyfriend. No more taking turns to go off to each other's dorm rooms, no more missing each other when we can't spend the night together because now we can spend every night in this cosy apartment. Just you and me and that very comfortable double bed." Roman smiled and Logan started to return it.  
"Well.. I did read that memory foam is good for back support."  
"Mmhm." Roman put the box down and made his way over to him again.  
"And it is convenient to share a double bed, much less complicated than when we would be lying on a twin sized together and there hardly be any room for us."  
"That's not all it's good for Logan." Roman lifted his chin and leaned in to kiss him. Logan softened under the kiss, the worries of moving day melting away.  
"I'm glad we're moving in so we can have a place just for us." Logan said quietly. "When we shut that door on the rest of the world there's no one but you and me."  
"I like that too." Roman smiled. "I think we should have a first in this new place."  
"Alright, but you'll have to let me get out the bedding first, it's just a bare mattress in there." Logan said, already loosening his tie. Roman smirked and held up his phone that started playing music through the bluetooth speaker.  
"I meant dancing."  
"Oh- right-" Logan blushed red and Roman chuckled at him. A slow song was playing and Roman took Logan in his arms and started swaying with him.  
"We can always do your idea later.." Roman whispered which only seemed to make Logan blush harder. Logan laughed at himself a little.  
"I turn into such an idiot around you."  
"You could never be that. I think it's cute that I can fluster you after all this time."  
"I think you'll still be able to fluster me when we're old and we've been married for years and years." Logan said before realising he'd said the "m" word. "Um- not married- I mean it's way too soon to joke about that, we're just moving in today-" Roman laughed and pulled him closer as he danced with him.  
"You're so adorable, I love you."  
"I love you.." Logan said. Roman smiled softly and leaned against Logan's shoulder as they danced around their kitchen, ignoring the piles of unopened boxes around them.

Now, their last night here. Logan stood in the kitchen and played the same song, Roman entering the room once he heard it. He knew at once what it meant and this time let Logan lead him in a slow dance.  
"I'll miss this place.. it's like we're leaving a piece of us behind." Roman said.  
"I think we're taking a lot more with us than we're leaving behind." Logan said, holding him close.  
"We came here just two clueless kids in love, now we're engaged with kids on the way."  
"If we could go back in time and tell them they would be out of their minds terrified."  
"Especially young Roman. I don't even know how current Roman is okay with all this change at once but I'm just rolling with it." Roman smirked.  
"Me too. I'd say so far we're handling it pretty excellently."  
"I'll say." They spent some more time reminiscing before they had to go to the door and say their last goodbyes. Goodbye apartment, goodbye old life. Hello new horizons and a family worth changing everything for.


	19. Baby Shower Interrupted

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tw: car crash, hospital and injury

The new house was starting to come together, all clean and pretty. And now it was about to be messed up again with party food and tacky decorations. This baby shower was a milestone that they were officially a month away from the due date. Things were getting serious. Logan passed the nursery and looked inside to see Roman sitting on the floor folding baby clothes.  
"Nesting. An instinct parents get a few weeks before the birth to clean and prepare for the baby's arrival." Logan recited.  
"You have that book on pregnancy memorised by now." Roman muttered, keeping focus on what he was doing.  
"Do you want to take a break?" Logan came over and sat next to him.  
"We can't take a break Logan, we're not prepared at all! We don't have half the things we need!"  
"We held off because the gifts people will give us today will probably cover a lot of it. And we can shop for the rest afterwards."  
"It's just- hitting me now I guess." Roman looked up at Logan, a worried look in his eyes. "That I don't know the first thing about being a father, and everyone was right I did rush into this.. and I'm going to mess it all up."  
"Roman.." Logan put his arms around him and held him. Roman buried his face in his chest. "That's not true. I mean every first time parent feels that way, it's perfectly natural."  
"You've been so calm.. recently I mean."  
"Well that's because it hit me right around the time you said 'Logan we should adopt the baby'" Logan said smiling a little. "And I've been adjusting since then. We've both been reading and learning what we can but we can never really know until they're born and we experience it for ourselves. I'm sure we'll pick it up as we go along. We're no different than a straight couple who's had an accidental pregnancy really.”  
“Yeah… it’s not fair, we’re supposed to be able to avoid that!” Logan laughed and kissed Roman’s temple.  
“Just like them, we’ll figure it out as we go along. Because we chose to bring these children into our lives, and we’ll choose to love and care for them as best we can.”  
“You’re right, you’re right.”  
“As your husband you’ll have to get used to me always being right.”  
“And always being a smart ass.” Roman smirked at him. He held up one of the onesies. “It’s so small.. I’ve been this close to crying all day. It’s getting real now.”  
“I know. This is really happening.” Logan leaned his head on his shoulder.  
Later on almost everyone had arrived at the baby shower, save for Virgil and Remus. Roman sat amongst the piles of presents, eyes sparkling. He reached out and tentatively ripped a corner of the Roman.  
“Roman, are you opening a gift?” Elisa said, catching him in the act. Roman pulled his hand back.  
“Whaat, no!”  
“You can’t open gifts until Remus gets here.”  
“Not even one, tiny little one?”  
“He will kill you.”  
“But he’s taking forever! Logan will you call him?” Roman looked up at him.  
“It is odd for him to be so late. For an important family event at least.” Logan went over to the phone and his hand was hovering over it when he heard the doorbell. He smiled knowingly. “That’ll be him.”  
“Finally! I want to open these! Especially the big one!” Roman grinned.  
“You’ll love ours Roman, it’s a lifesaver for me with Sierra.” Patton said.  
“I’ll trust you the most, experienced dad.” Roman said. Janus cleared his throat. “And you Janus, of course. Any advice you give, I will take on gratefully.”  
Logan opened the door and saw Virgil standing there alone.  
“Oh, hello Virgil, please come in.” Logan let him in the house, noticing a worry on his face. “Do you have any idea when Remus will be coming?” Virgil turned around to look at him.  
“He’s not here?”  
“No, we’ve been waiting for him.”  
“I thought he was with you…”  
“Virgil… what’s wrong?” Logan glanced at the party where Roman was laughing about something with Elisa. He pushed the door closed so him and Virgil were alone in the hallway. Virgil started looking slightly panicked, fidgeting with his hoodie zip.  
“We- we had a fight last night. It was our first one, he was just acting so different and clearly upset about something but no matter what I said he wouldn’t tell me what’s wrong he just.. Pushed me away and ignored me and me and said stuff about how I’d never understand. He was acting so weird, so unlike him.”  
“Weird how?” Logan said, starting to get an idea but not liking it.  
“Just- meaner and he wasn’t making sense a lot of the time. I guessed it was because he’d been drinking.”  
“What..” Logan’s heart sank.  
“Yeah, I mean he started drinking a lot actually. He was really drunk. I tried to get him to let me take him home but he left on his own, refused to let me help him. The last time I saw him was last night when he left.”  
“No.. oh no, Virgil. Remus can’t drink. He’s an alcoholic.”  
“What? No-” Panic fully took hold of Virgil. “I-I didn’t know! I swear I didn’t, he never told me!”  
“I know. I’m sure he didn’t. It sounds like him.” Logan put his hands on Virgil’s arms and felt him shaking. “Can you take some deep breaths Virgil. The only way we can help Remus now is if we stay calm and find out where he is.” Virgil nodded and closed his eyes, trying to breathe as normally as possible.  
“Hey,” Roman had come into the hallway and they both turned to him. “I thought you were talking with Remus out here! My previous thought was that he was somewhere making kissy face with you Virgil but if you’re here where is he?” Roman smile only dropped when he saw that neither of them were smiling. In fact Virgil was nearly in tears.  
“I don’t know..” He said quietly.  
“What do you mean you don’t know?” He looked between them.  
“Virgil hasn’t seen Remus since last night. Apparently.. He was drinking.” Logan said. Emotions were lit like a fire inside Roman. Fear, confusion, concern, guilt, but the one taking dominance at the moment was anger.  
“What!?” Roman directed at Virgil. “How could you let him drink?”  
“I didn’t know he had a problem with drinking!”  
“You didn’t know, what kind of a boyfriend doesn’t know a thing as huge as that!”  
“Roman, Remus is his own person who makes his own decisions. Don’t take this out on Virgil.” Logan said.  
“Well then yeah- what about Remus, why did he do this, why is he going back to that dark place I mean how could he do this!?” Roman’s voice was choked as tears began to stream down his face. “I can’t lose him again!”  
“We’ll find him.” Logan said. The three of them heard the phone in the hallway start to ring. Roman looked away, sniffling and trying to put himself back together. Logan answered it.  
“Hello?” he said. Virgil approached Roman cautiously. “Yes, this is his brother’s partner.” Roman’s gasped. Virgil put his arms around him and Roman leaned into them. The two of them holding their breath and listening to Logan. “I see. What happened exactly?” Roman clung to Virgil and Virgil kept holding him. They knew they were both coming up with the worst possible scenarios but the thing keeping them both from spiralling was that they were in the panic together. They both had to hold on for him. “We’ll be there soon. Thank you for calling.” Logan hung up and lowered the phone. Roman and Virgil looked up at him. “He’s in the hospital.” Logan, the strongest of them all was struggling to keep himself together.

The three of them made it to the hospital within 15 minutes of the call. Elisa had wanted to come too but they insisted it would be too much for a heavily pregnant woman to come get caught up in the stress of it all, she stayed at the house and would wait for news. Roman flung open the door open to the waiting room and marched over to the desk. Logan and Virgil followed quickly behind him.  
"Remus Sanders, where is he?" Roman demanded from the nurse behind the desk. She seemed used to this kind of interaction.  
"Remus Sanders? I'll find out for you, please take a seat."  
"I think I'll stay here." Roman folded his arms and she sighed a little, picking up the phone and speaking into it quietly. Logan put a hand on Roman's shoulder.  
"We won't be allowed to see him right away."  
"I don't care, I need to see him. I'll run in and find him and fight off any doctors that try and stop me."  
"You're not going to do that."  
"He's being seen to. I've let the doctor know you're here, he'll come and speak to you as soon as he's available." The nurse told them calmly.  
"Is he okay, is it serious?" Roman asked.  
"I don't know but the doctor will be able to answer soon."  
"When is soon? I need to know now."  
"Roman- thank you for your help." Logan smiled gratefully at the receptionist and led Roman to sit down. Virgil sat down beside them, picking at the edges of his hoodie sleeves. If this whole situation wasn't already extremely stressful, there was the fact that hospitals tended to make him nervous. The smell of sanitisers and the melancholy that hung in the air.  
"I can't just- sit here not knowing. What did they say on the phone again? The exact words?" Roman said to Logan.  
"Exact words were he's been involved in a traffic collision, possibly while intoxicated. Please come to the hospital."  
"Was he walking, was he driving- is he going to need major surgery or does he just have some bruises, I need to know how worked up I should be right now!" Roman was close to crying again but he was fighting it. He didn't want to break down or be carried through this, he had to be strong for Remus. Logan held his hand and it did provide a grounding source of comfort.  
"How about, until we know what's wrong we won't let ourselves panic about what could be, or go into what ifs. Because it's really not helpful to us or Remus. When we do find out we can do our best to help from there. Okay Roman?"  
"Yeah.. I'll try."  
"Virgil?" Logan looked over at Virgil who flinched as if being summoned out of a thought spiral.  
"What?"  
"Can we also promise not to blame ourselves?"  
"Oh.. well.." Virgil looked at a spot on the ground. "It's pretty hard for me to promise that. That's just how my mind works. I mean… it's at least partially my fault. I let him drink and go out on his own and didn't check up on him. I could've tried harder to get him to stay, I could've.. I should've known he had a problem with drinking, I'm dating him.."  
"Remus doesn't like talking about that part of his past. Even with us who know him really well. It's probably not good of him to keep his feelings bottled up and he needs to be more open so we can help him prevent relapses in the future. And he should've told you, it's not your fault you didn't know."  
"Still… I'm so sorry Roman.." Virgil said quietly. Roman looked over at him and his expression softened a little.  
"No I'm sorry about how I acted before, my emotions were getting the better of me. Don't blame yourself because I don't blame you at all. And I don't regret setting you and Remus up. You've only brought good into his life and I think he's much better for it."  
"Thank you Roman." Virgil said and stopped fiddling with his clothes for the first time since they arrived. They kept on waiting quietly together. Roman kept on holding Logan's hand, leaning his head on his shoulder and keeping his eyes trained on the door for a doctor to come and give them news. Logan was always the calm grounding presence when it came to these kind of things and every now and then he would stay something comforting but on the inside he was worrying immensely. He just wasn't going to voice these worries and make the whole group worse. Virgil was deep breathing with a technique Logan had suggested. He counted how many he could get through before his mind came up with an image of Remus injured that distressed him. His high score was three by the time the doctor came and spoke to them. They all stood up.  
"Are you here for Remus Sanders?" He asked.  
"Yes, I'm his brother. Please, how bad is it?" Roman asked, desperate to be put out of his misery.  
"It could be a lot worse, I think he's going to be fine. He crashed his car into a tree, no one else was involved. The windshield shattered so he has some cuts we've been cleaning up and he hit his head so he has a concussion but there's no major brain injury. He should recover fully in a few weeks. We're keeping him in for observation and we've given him some pain medication." Roman was listening and felt some of the weight on his shoulders being lifted in relief. It was not even close to the worst scenarios in his head. But he was still standing in a hospital hearing his brother's name being said so all was not well yet.  
"Can we see him?" Roman asked.  
"Yes but please try not to overwhelm him. He's very tired and confused just now."  
"I just really need to see him." Roman said. The doctor led the three of them down the hallway. Roman and Virgil glanced at each other with mutual understanding. This would not happen again, they would make sure of it.


	20. Necessary Setback

Remus was dreaming. It took place in a dark, infinitely large room. He couldn't see a thing but he heard voices. Roman's and Virgil's.  
"Ree..? Ree!" Roman's voice said.  
"Shh, he's asleep." Virgil's voice answered.  
"He's not sleeping, he snores when he sleeps. It's as loud as a plane engine."  
"Oh believe me I know.. but maybe concussed sleeping is different."  
Oh, this wasn't a dream. Remus made some effort to open his eyes, squinting in the white light. He saw blurry shapes he could just about recognise as his brother and boyfriend respectively.  
"Hey Buddy.." He turned his head to the Roman shape sitting beside his bed. Virgil was sitting next to him. When he looked beyond them he could make out Logan standing to the side.  
"Ro… where.." Remus closed his eyes again, feeling around in his mind for the memories that lead up to this. They were there but just out of reach. "Am I?"  
"You're in the hospital Remus, you crashed your car, do you remember?" Roman said. The word "crash" made one of the memories come forward. The glass when it shattered ,the shards flew everywhere...  
"Yeah.. I think I do.." Remus said and looked up at Roman again. This time his vision had a little more definition to it. "I was driving even though I was still drunk from last night and.. and this morning and… I was on my way to your baby shower. Your baby shower, no I missed it!"  
"Shh, it's alright. We didn't even start it properly, we were waiting for you."  
"So I ruined everything.." Remus frowned. "I'm the worst uncle ever and I haven't even started yet!"  
"No, Rem. We're here for you now, we're going to sort this out. Because you are going to be the best uncle ever for the twins but they want you to be safe and happy when they get to meet you."  
"I'm so sorry Roman… I- I broke down, I was weak and stupid and reckless and I thought I was completely over the stupid addiction, I thought it wouldn't matter. I thought I was stronger than it. But it just brings out the worst side of me.. makes me absolutely lose control. I can't let it happen again- it won't! I promise."  
"I know you'll try but you can't do it all alone. You need to let us help and you need professional help too. And you need to stop fighting other's help or holding in your feelings." Roman said softly. Remus nodded, head full of swarming thoughts, muddled by the medicine and the concussion. “Right now you need to rest and recover.” Roman squeezed Remus’s hand. “I love you Remus.”  
“I love you too bro.” Remus smiled weakly. “I’m sorry I’m- taking a full step backwards after doing so well for so long. Well actually… I might’ve made it look like I was doing better than I was sometimes. I just hate seeing you worry about me.”  
“Let me worry, let me help. Because we all care so much about you.” Roman said. “You may have taken a step backwards but you might’ve needed this so you can move forward and get better. This won’t be like last time because I’ll be right here with you every step of the way. You’re not alone.” Roman assured and Remus nodded a little, blinking back tears.  
“Fuck... I’m a whole mess right now.” He laughed, tears still streaming. Roman smiled, leaned down and hugged him gently. Remus managed to lift a hand to put around him.  
“Roman? Elisa’s on the phone asking after Remus.” Logan said. Roman sat back up and Remus patted his arm.  
“You guys should go home.” Remus said.  
“I don’t want to leave you yet.”  
“Go home. You can see me tomorrow. I promise I’ll be fine for a few hours.” Remus quickly wiped his tears and smiled to reassure him.  
“Alright, if you’re sure.” Roman hugged him again before getting up. Logan came over and hugged Remus.  
“Don’t scare us like that again, we really need you.” Logan said to him.  
“Aw, you care about me.”  
“I love you, you’re my brother-in-law.” Logan smiled and pulled back. Remus smiled at the two of them.  
“Love you guys..” He watched them go, and turned to Virgil who’d been sitting there quietly the whole time. He reached out a hand and Virgil broke into sobs. He came over and curled up next to Remus on the narrow hospital bed, crying into his chest. Remus put his arm around him. “I’m so sorry.. I’m so sorry Virge- for everything.”  
“It doesn’t matter I’m just happy you’re okay you idiot- don’t do that to me, I was freaking out-”  
“I know.. I know. But I’m fine see?” Virgil lifted his head and looked at Remus’s face covered in cuts and bruises.  
“I’m hideous aren’t I?”  
“No…” Virgil shook his head.  
"I'm sorry. I should've told you from the start."  
"It's okay."  
“It’s not. And I shouldn’t have talked to you that way last night either.”  
“Well- you were drunk.”  
“That’s not an excuse. I know what alcohol does to me, I know I have to stay away from it. I know I have to make some big changes to get better. I know I'm a mess right now."  
"It's just.. you help me so much when I'm anxious or not doing good. Can't you let me help you?" Virgil brushed Remus's hair back. "I just want to be there for you like you are for me…" Remus nodded, smiling with tears sparkling in his eyes again.  
"Okay…" Remus whispered.  
"And can you promise me, you won't do something stupid and end up here again? I can't handle that. I… kinda like having you around so I don't want you to get hurt again." Virgil looked into Remus's dark brown eyes. Remus was smiling softly.  
"I love you." He said. Virgil's eyes widened, blinking in a double take.  
"What..?"  
"I love you Virgil. It's okay if you don't want to say it back yet. I just wanted to tell you so-" Remus's words were cut off by Virgil's lips pressing against his. Remus was so tired and floppy he could only lay back and smile against the kiss. Virgil pulled back, beaming at him. "And your answer is..?"  
"Eh, you're okay." Virgil smirked. "Of course I love you too dummy."  
"Yesss. You're mine now emo." Remus closed his eyes and yawned. Virgil laughed quietly and started to get up from the bed. Remus caught his hand and pulled him back. "Don't go.. not until I'm asleep and you can hear me snoring like a jet engine. I heard that by the way."  
"Roman's words not mine.!"  
"You agreed. And it's all very well because you share a bed with this annoying snoring most nights."  
"I never said it was annoying." Virgil lay back down, leaning on Remus's chest. "When I wake up in the middle of the night it's relieving to hear you're still alive."  
"I'm not going anywhere."  
"Please don't.." Virgil closed his eyes and listened to Remus's heartbeat and internally thought he could listen to that sound forever.


End file.
